


Nothing Gold Can Stay

by Inkedroplets



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Domestic Fluff, Eventual Smut, F/F, Fluff, Happy Ending, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I am Supercorp Trash, Kara Danvers Needs a Hug, Kid Fic, Lena Luthor Knows Kara Danvers Is Supergirl, Love Confessions, Mutual Pining, Post-Canon, Romance, Single Parent Lena Luthor, SuperCorp
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-08
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:35:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 33,022
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26888221
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Inkedroplets/pseuds/Inkedroplets
Summary: Unable to trust or forgive herself after reconciling with Kara, Lena intends to return to how she lived her life before coming to National City in self-imposed exile unaware of how much her life could change and what might happen when she winds back up in National City years later with a daughter in tow and runs into Kara again who looks like she hasn't aged a day.
Relationships: Alex Danvers/Kelly Olsen, Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor, Querl Dox/Nia Nal
Comments: 132
Kudos: 534





	1. Trick or Treat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Home is where I want to be  
>  But I guess I'm already there  
> I come home, she lifted up her wings  
> I guess that this must be the place  
> I can't tell one from the other  
> Did I find you or you find me?_
> 
> -Kishi Bashi [This Must Be The Place](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tBPCvU5V8Ds)

_We’re not OK, are we?_

It was a miracle that Lena saw the email at all. She only ever checked her email infrequently, often going weeks or in this case, months without ever opening it. The only person who contacted her was Sam and while they exchanged pleasantries now and again, the brunt of their communication consisted of Sam keeping her up to date on the comings and goings at L-Corp. Not that Lena was all that interested these days. She had walked away from the company, leaving Sam to take over in her stead. That hadn’t been the only thing she had left behind. She had walked away from National City, had walked away from the people she thought were her friends, had walked away from Kara…  
  
Sometimes it felt like no time at all had passed between then and now but it had been ten years which made the reason for Sam’s email all the more puzzling. _Why now?_ she wondered.

 _Dear Lena,_ _  
_ _  
_ _I hope you’ve been well. I wish that this was your regularly scheduled pop-in that I’m sure you just love. Ruby and I are doing just fine. Her a little more than me and that’s exactly why I’m emailing you. Lillian came out of the woodwork a few weeks ago and made a grab for L-Corp. With as many lawyers as we have on retainer, I assumed that they would be able to deal with it without much fuss but it looks like she might have some ground to stand on. The news hasn’t gone public yet but I’m sure it will soon enough._ _  
  
_

_Lillian’s using your absence to try and sow discord with the shareholders and I’m sorry to say that it’s working. The Luthor name still holds weight and while I’m sure you knew, some on the board weren’t thrilled with the direction you took the company. They can evidently hold a grudge._ _  
_ _  
_ _The lawyers are gearing up for a slog and if I thought we’d come out the other side fine I would never even think about bothering you. But if stock prices tumble any lower it might be enough to swing some on the fence to their side and force me out. I have a lovely retirement package all lined up but I doubt you want the company falling into Lillian’s hands. Would it be too much to ask you to come back to National City for a week or two?_ _  
_ _  
_ _No one can handle Lillian as well as you can and reminding everyone that you’re simply retired and not dead would do a lot to swing the pendulum in our favor. You don’t have to, of course. I know you left for a reason and I feel bad for asking you back to help solve a problem that I should be able to handle on my own._ _  
_ _  
_ _All the best_ _  
_ _Sam_ _  
_ _  
_ _P.S. How’s Fi?_

She re-read the email twice before powering down her laptop, staring at the blank screen and her reflection in it. If not for Sam, Lena would have been sorely tempted to simply let Lillian have the company. She had missed a lot of things in her ten years away from National City but dealing with her mother was not among them. Returning there now to get into what promised to be a drag-out fight with Lillian was the last thing that she wanted to do but what choice did she have? Whatever reason that Lillian had for trying to regain control of L-Corp, Lena knew that nothing good could come from it. She _needed_ to go back, no matter how much she didn’t want to. 

She powered on her laptop, opened up Sam’s email again, and typed out a very short message. _  
_ _  
_ _Sam,_

 _I’m sorry that I’m only just seeing your email now. I’ll be on a flight to National City as soon as I can, tomorrow at the earliest. Try not to let Lillian get under your skin too much, it’s what she wants. Fi’s doing well, you can see for yourself soon enough._ _  
_ _  
_ _Lena_

 _Was that why you’re doing this?_ Lena wondered. _To get under my skin?_ That seemed as good a guess as any but she knew how pointless it was to waste time speculating. She would know soon enough. Right now, she was more concerned about Fi and what to do about her.  
  
_If she doesn’t want to go then we won’t go,_ Lena told herself. _I’ll do what I can from here and if I can’t stop Lillian from taking back the company, I’ll do my best to make her work for it._ _  
_ _  
_ She stood up, rubbing at her neck, working out the kink that had already started to settle there. Gone were the days that she could spend all day working on her laptop until an ungodly hour, sleep far too little, and somehow find the energy to do it all over again the next day. She thought that she might sleep well tonight if only out of necessity. She might very well be leaping back into the lion’s den after so many years away. And this time with a child in tow… 

It seemed the textbook definition of insanity to bring Fi intentionally into Lillian’s orbit. She wasn’t sure if Lillian knew that she was now living in Ireland or if she had simply never bothered to look for her. She hadn’t left a forwarding address when she left National City but she hadn’t made an effort to cover her tracks either. Her exile had been of the self-imposed variety, at least that’s what she had thought of it at first.  
  
_I’m too old for this shit,_ Lena thought, a very wry smile on her lips. She padded down the hall towards her bedroom and stopped at the room right next to hers. The door was covered so completely in drawings that Lena almost had trouble finding the handle. She turned the knob silently and opened the door just a crack so she could peek in on the young girl dozing in a bed that would take her several years to grow into, her raven-colored hair spread out in a corona on her pillow.

Lena smiled, happy to see her sleeping peacefully. She shut the door, lingered there for a moment to make sure that there was no interruption in Fi’s rhythmic breathing, and padded the rest of the way down to her bedroom not feeling the least bit tired.  
  
When Lena awoke the next morning she wasn’t at all surprised to see that Fi had climbed into bed with her and had a book open on her lap. This was their morning routine and Lena found it infinitely better than waking to the sound of an alarm  
  
Their eyes met and Lena snaked a hand out from under her blankets to ruffle Fi’s hair, pressing her hand gently to Fi’s cheek. “How did you sleep, my treasure?”  
  
“Good,” she said and turned a page of her book.  
  
“Me too,” Lena lied. She had fallen asleep sometime just before dawn. She felt more confused than tired but she didn’t let it show on her face. “What page are you on?” Lena asked, sitting up and leaning in close to get a glimpse of Fi’s book.  
  
“This one,” Fi said, smiling shyly and turning the book towards her.  
  
“Eighteen flavors?” Lena nodded her approval. That poem was the one Fi most requested when she read her a story from _Where the Sidewalk Ends._ “That must have made you hungry,” she joked. “Let's go get you some breakfast and me some coffee. No ice-cream though, at least not for breakfast.”  
  
That got Fi giggling and she carefully closed the book, trapping a small flower-shaped bookmark between the pages.  
  
Lena stood up and felt the cold seep into her through her bare feet. She scooped Fi up in her arms and padded down the hall towards their small kitchen. Cooking had never been what Lena considered one of her strong points but with nothing but time on her hands and especially after finding herself caring for a child, she had picked up a few tricks along the way. Not that she was likely to need any of them in the morning.  
  
“Cereal?” Lena asked, setting Fi down.  
  
Fi nodded and pulled her chair back from the table before clambering into it effortlessly.  
  
“Semi-healthy,” she asked, holding up one box. “Or unhealthy? She held up a far more colorful box in her other hand and pretended to look shocked when Fi chose the far less healthy option. “Good choice.” She set the box down on the table, grabbing a bowl and spoon for Fi, setting them down in front of her.  
  
“We’re almost out of milk,” Lena said, taking the carton from the fridge and giving it a shake. She instinctively went to add it to the grocery list she kept attached to the fridge before she remembered that they might not even be here tomorrow. “Fi?”  
  
Fi had just finished carefully pouring cereal for herself and looked up at Lena, almost looking nervous.  
  
“What do you think about going on a little vacation?” Lena asked, busying herself with the espresso machine.  
  
“A vacation?”  
  
Lena nodded. “I got an email from an old friend of mine. She needs my help with something back in National City…”  
  
“Where you used to live.”  
  
“Before I came here, yes.” Lena smiled. She took her coffee, walked over to the table, and pulled her chair out before sitting down. “If you wanted to come with me I thought we could take a trip there. Just for a week, maybe two. But if you don’t feel up to it, we don’t have to go. I’m sure I can be plenty helpful working from here.” _I could put inconveniencing Lillian under the special skills section on my resume,_ she thought. _I’d have a ten-year gap in my work history that would be rather hard to explain, of course._

Fi swirled her spoon around her bowl, looking first at the calendar on the far wall and then to Lena. “When would we leave?”  
  
“Today if we can manage it,” Lena said, already knowing that she would have no trouble securing tickets if she tried to get them.  
  
“Today…” Fi’s gaze returned to the calendar and so did Lena’s, comprehension dawning on her face after puzzling over Fi’s reluctance for a moment or two.  
  
“Halloween…”  
  
Fi looked embarrassed but nodded.  
  
“We would never miss that,” Lena assured her. She reached out and squeezed Fi’s arm gently. “We’d just have to do our trick-or-treating there.” She glanced out the window. “National City is a big place, you’re almost guaranteed to get more candy there.” The small town they lived in might have been a great deal friendlier than any city Lena had ever been in but she knew that even if they were to visit every single house on their route twice it would take them less than an hour and that was including the obligatory oohing and aahing over whatever costume that Fi picked out. 

“But if you would rather stay here, Fi, that’s perfectly fine.” Lena hated the idea of whisking Fi off to National City if she didn’t want to go when Lena wasn’t all that certain _she_ wanted to return.  
  
“I want to go,” Fi said, shaking a little more cereal into her bowl.  
  
“Are you sure?” Lena asked.  
  
Fi nodded. “I’m sure.” She looked up from her cereal bowl shyly. “How much more candy do you think I could get?”  
  
Lena looked at her over her coffee cup, not sure if she should laugh or not. “I’ll run the numbers and get back to you.”  
  
“I’ve never been on a plane,” Fi said, her bright smile dimming somewhat.  
  
“There’s nothing to it,” Lena said, not thinking now was the time to tell her that she didn’t like flying either. “And you’ll be right next to me.” She scooted her chair closer to Fi’s so that they were right next to one another. “Just like this.” Lena gave her a playful bump with her arm. “So if I snore on the plane you’ll need to wake me up so I don’t bother everybody else on board.” She made an exaggerated snoring noise that sent Fi into hysterics.  
  
“I’ll just let you sleep,” Fi assured her and made a similar snoring noise.  
  
“How very sweet of you,” Lena said and plucked a marshmallow from the top of Fi’s bowl and tossed it into her mouth. _No backing out now,_ she thought, the gears in her head that had ground to an unwilling halt when she had drifted off before dawn starting up again. They _might_ be able to make an afternoon flight if they were lucky but she would need to be quick. She took two hurried gulps of her coffee, nearly scalding her mouth in the process, and stood up from her chair. “I need to see what flight I can get us on. Can you go to your room and pick out some clothes and toys you want to take with us?”  
  
Fi stood up and nodded. She made a mad dash towards her room nearly tripping over her own feet when she came to a very sudden stop in the middle of the living room. “We didn’t buy my costume yet,” she said, looking worried again.  
  
Lena hadn’t forgotten. They had gone costume shopping a handful of times but each time they had, Fi hadn’t been able to definitively choose. She had come close the last time but indecision had won out. Now, with only a few days before Halloween, she would need to come to a decision soon. “Do you know what you want to be for Halloween?”  
  
Fi shook her head, looking far too distressed for one as young as seven.  
“You have the whole plane ride to decide,” Lena said, wanting to put her mind at ease. “And then we can go shopping once we land.”  
  
“Right after we land?”  
  
“If you’re not too tired? Right after we land.” That was likely a given. Fi was at that age where there were simply not enough hours in the day to completely tire her out no matter how valiantly Lena tried. Just last week they had spent nearly all day at the park and while Lena couldn’t remember ever feeling more tired, Fi had continued to run circles around her right up until her bedtime.  
  
“I won’t be,” Fi said, already running off again.  
  
“I might be,” Lena called after her, knowing she was too far away to hear her properly, smiling despite how nervous she felt. She was going back to National City. The thought didn’t fill her with dread as it might have years ago but she felt uneasy at the prospect of returning. What was the saying? You can’t go home again? Just like Wendy couldn’t return to Neverland, Lena felt like she had left that part of her life too firmly in the past to revisit it now. Even after all this time, Lena couldn’t be certain if it ever really was home to her but it was maybe the closest thing to one before she had moved here and found Fi.  
  


_How have you been?_ Lena wondered, putting her mug and Fi’s bowl in the sink, a hazy image of Kara and her standing in her old penthouse floating to her mind, the image becoming sharper and the memory beginning to play out in her head.

* * *

_Ten years ago_

“We’re not OK, are we?”

Kara had rehearsed this conversation in her head so many times and hated that she had already gone so far off-script. They had just met up the day before for lunch. Not _exactly_ like old times but the closest that they’ve come to it in months. It’s how things had been since the two of them had begun the arduous process of easing back into a friendship that Kara had feared had been beyond repair. 

They were talking again and Lena had even started coming to game nights again but Kara couldn’t shake the feeling that Lena was simply going through the motions. Her smile seemed so different and while Lena was more than happy to let Kara pull her into a hug, Lena never tried to hug her.  
  
It could have all been in her head. After months of barely speaking to one another, it would have been all too easy for her to manufacture a problem that wasn’t even there. She hoped that the look of polite confusion on Lena’s face at Kara’s strange question would morph into one of bewilderment. That whatever strangeness she felt was either all in her head or simply another bump in the road that they would need to get over.  
  
“No, Kara… We’re not OK.” There was no anger in her voice, in fact, to Kara’s ear it sounded completely devoid of emotion. Their eyes met for an instant and Lena stood up, crossing the room towards the balcony, and looked out over the city where the sun had just begun to sink below the horizon.

“I understand if you’re still angry.I’ve been rushing things, I know…” Alex had warned her of doing just that a number of times. She had been the lone holdout in the group that hadn’t quite yet forgiven Lena although she had for Kara’s sake at the very least been friendly when their paths had crossed. “If you need more time, Lena, I can give you as much as you need.” She smiled wanly. “It’s really no trouble.” _You’re worth the wait._  
  
“I don’t think it’s just time I need Kara…” She took a deep breath and Kara could hear Lena’s heartbeat that she normally found so soothing, hammering at a frantic pace that was at odds with the almost serene expression on her face. “I’ve been trying, I really have been-”  
  
“I know you have,” Kara said quickly. “I have too.”  
  
Lena smiled. “I’ve noticed. And I’m grateful, Kara, I am. It’s just… It’s not that simple. I know that I can trust you again someday, Kara…” Her smile brightened and then dimmed like the shuddering flame of a candle. “But that’s not what I’m worried about. I don’t know if I can ever trust myself again. I loved you so much and I still hurt you… I lied to you for months, I used you.” 

_Loved? Not love?_

I could have killed you at the Fortress.”  
  
“Lena, you were hurt and angry…”  
  
I was,” Lena said. “And a part of me still is. It wasn’t an excuse then and it isn’t one now.” She looked down at the floor, and Kara watched a tear slide down Lena’s cheek before dropping to the floor. “Who’s to say I won’t lash out again? Not ever try and hurt you again?”  
  
“You wouldn’t do that,” Kara said. She stood up, meaning to hug Lena, something she seemed to sense because Lena stuck an arm out as if to ward her off.  
  
“You don’t know that Kara and neither do I and that’s what scares me.” She looked at her reflection in the balcony door and turned away from it as if she could barely stand to look at herself. “I thought that I was different from Lex… That I was better… But maybe deep down I’m really not.”  
  
“No!-”

“If it was just time Kara…” She shook her head again. “I wish it was just time that I needed.”

* * *

It turned out that getting ready for and onto the flight to National City turned out to be far more of a white-knuckle experience than Lena had expected. The only tickets she could get that day were for a flight leaving in the early afternoon which gave her very little time to get both of them ready and to the airport. 

Even as she tore through the house, first looking for both their passports and then pulling her luggage out of a hall closet that she hadn’t opened in years and running down the mental checklist of things she needed to do before they left, she was careful not to let the worry show on her face. The last thing she wanted to do was for Fi to worry before they even boarded the plane. Children seemed at both times oblivious and hyper-aware about such things and Lena was relieved to see that her panic about their trip hadn’t spilled over onto her. Fi appeared to be too preoccupied with choosing her costume to notice Lena’s unease about the trip. 

It was only after they had boarded the plane and were getting settled into their seats that Fi seemed to realize that the thing they were sitting in was going to go up into the air before too long. Lena fastened Fi’s seatbelt, pulling it tight and making an exaggerated clicking noise with her mouth when the seatbelt latched that couldn’t quite entice a laugh out of Fi but it did get her to flash Lena a very weak smile.  
  
The logical part of Lena wanted to put Fi’s mind by assuring her that statistically flying was the safest way to travel but knew better than to frame it that way. It did little to put her mind at ease and doubted that it would do much for Fi. As it so often did, distraction seemed the far better option. “You know, I still need to pick a costume too,” Lena whispered, settling back in her seat. “Any suggestions?”  
  
Fi who had been looking straight ahead, kicking her feet nervously against the seat, stopped suddenly and turned to look at Lena appraisingly. “Maybe something scary,” Fi said. “But not _too_ scary.”  
  
“Never,” Lena said, putting a hand on her chest as if such a thought were simply unfathomable. “We don’t want to scare everyone.” _Not an easy thing to do when your last name is Luthor._  
  
“Or me,” Fi said and shook her head.  
  
“Or you,” Lena agreed. “ Hmm... “ She felt the plane give a little jerk as the pilot prepared for takeoff. “What about a witch?”  
  
“ _Maybe…_ What kind of witch?”  
  
“Definitely a good witch, I don’t think that’s so scary.” _No matter how much I might look the part of a bad one._  
  
“Like Glinda?”  
  
“Maybe a little less pink but somewhere in that general area, love.” She felt the plane begin to pick up speed and clasped one of Fi’s hands tightly in her own, squeezing it. “Wand or no wand?”  
  
Fi looked momentarily distracted, glancing out the window before returning her attention to Lena. “No wand,” she said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.  
  
“You’re right,” Lena said, nodding in agreement. “But what about you, my treasure? Any clue what you want to go as?”  
  
Fi shook her head. “I think I need to see the costumes first.”  
  
Lena nodded wisely. “Never a good idea to rush.”  
  
“Mom?”  
  
“Hmm?”  
  
“We’re flying.” Fi pressed one hand to the window, peering down at the ground that Lena knew must have looked so far away already. 

Lena took one of Fi’s hands and held it tightly. “Are you nervous?”  
  
Fi shook her head, still staring out the window. “It feels like magic.”  
  
_It really can…_ Lena stroked Fi’s hair, settling back into her seat, feeling more at ease, not thinking of the science of flight but of how it felt to fly with Kara and how safe she felt in her arms…  
  


* * *

True to form, Fi hopped off the plane fresh as a daisy while Lena zombie-shuffled through the airport the way she always did after a long flight. After a brief stop at a coffee shop in the terminal for a pick-me-up and to the service desk to rent a car they were on the road again.  
  
As they drove into the city, Lena felt pangs of familiarity as she spotted places and buildings that looked to have changed so very little in the time she had been away. It felt however briefly that she had never truly left. Not that she felt that way for long. The longer she drove the more it felt to her like she was playing a game of ‘Spot the Difference’. This was unquestionably National City but it was no longer _her_ National City. Places, people, and businesses had come and gone during her time away and if asked a question about the city she would only be able to speak in the past tense. 

She pulled into the parking lot of the first store that they happened across and walked inside, hand-in-hand with Fi, letting go of her hand only when she promised not to run and watched as she immediately broke that promise when she spotted the aisles devoted to Halloween supplies.

 _She’s going to run facefirst into a cart if she isn’t careful._ Lena jogged after her, ready to scold her and finding it impossible to do so when she saw the look of wonder on her face she had from staring down the aisle at the sheer number of costumes she had to choose from. 

Lena watched Fi reach instinctively for one of the costumes closest to her. She held it out to Lena and smiled.  
  
“This one is pretty.”

“It is pretty, but are you sure you want that one, Fi?”  
  
Lena knelt so that she and the young girl were at eye-level. She gestured down the aisle with one swoop of her arm. “Because there are so many costumes that you haven’t looked at yet. Why don’t we hang onto this one and wait and decide later?”  
  
She clutched the princess costume tighter, tapping one finger against her chin, thinking a long while before she held it out to Lena, smiling. “Can you hold onto it for me?”  
  
“It would be an honor,” Lena said and took it from her, draping it over her arm and shaking her head slightly when the girl immediately tore down the aisle, coming to a sudden stop only a few feet away.  
  
“I like this one too,” she said, pointing to a cowboy costume complete with miniature ten-gallon hat. 

“You might be the first cowboy from Ireland, love, but you would look cute in that.”  
  
“Can you hold onto this one too?” she asked sweetly. 

_She already knows how to play me like a fiddle,_ Lena thought. “You think it’ll disappear if you turn around?”  
  
She shrugged and Lena took the costume off the rack, watching Fi return to browsing. _Maybe should have snagged a cart,_ she thought. Lena watched Fi take off down the aisle, running far too fast for her liking, passing by several costumes that didn’t seem to catch Fi’s eye. A ghost, a witch, a zombie, a grim reaper, and a vampire. Lena was just about to tell her to slow down when Fi came skidding to a stop. 

“Did you find another one you like?”  
  
Fi whipped around and nodded, beckoning Lena to join her. “I want this one,” she said confidently and pointed.  
  
Which one?” Lena tried to follow where Fi was pointing and knelt down again to try and follow where she was pointing.  
  
“This one,” Fi said and pointed again, this time tapping her finger against the costume.  
  
“That one…”  
  
Fi nodded, the bright smile on her face faltering somewhat when she saw the look on Lena’s face. “You don’t like it?”  
  
Lena blinked, shook her head, and smiled brightly, ruffling Fi’s hair. “Just want to make sure that’s the one you really want.” She held up her arms to show Fi the other costumes she had already picked out. 

Fi looked at the costume in her hand, held it out, looked up solemnly at Lena, and nodded. “I’m sure.” Instead of handing it to Lena to hold she clutched the miniature Supergirl costume tight to her, mimicking how Lena had draped the princess costume over her arm. “Is it too expensive?” she asked, looking suddenly worried.  
  
Lena chuckled. “No, love, it isn’t too expensive.” She ruffled her hair and jerked her head back in the direction they had started. “Let’s put these back and see if we can find something that I can wear.”  
  
There was no shortage of witch costumes for Lena to choose from although most of them would have shown a bit too much leg considering how cold Halloween was supposed to be. She settled on an emerald green cloak that was not only more sensible but would offer her at least a modicum of protection against the wind if Halloween night turned out to be a cold one.  
  
“We’ll just tell people I’m a good witch if they ask,” Lena said when they had climbed back into the car. _It will be up to them if they choose to believe me or not_ she thought.  
  
“They’ll know,” Fi said confidently. She was still clutching the Supergirl costume, turning it over to get a better look at the cape.  
  
“I like your confidence.” Lena grinned and pulled out of the parking lot and back out onto the busy street. “I know you still have plenty of gas in the tank but I’m ready to drop,” Lena said, punching at the car’s GPS to get directions to the hotel she had made reservations with before they had left. 

  
“I’m a little tired too,” Fi said.  
  
“That’s a first,” Lena said. “I was starting to think that I adopted a very adorable robot who had no need for sleep.”  
  
“Beep.” Fi giggled and went back to fiddling with the radio. 

* * *

Fi had been more than a little tired. She was sound asleep when Lena arrived at the hotel and remained so up until Lena tucked her into bed. She woke up just long enough to smile sleepily at Lena who pressed a kiss to her forehead.  
  
Lena lingered in the doorway before shutting the door behind her. She knew that Fi wouldn’t be down for long and if she were smart she would get a nap in before then but first, she needed to make a call.  
  
Not even sure if the number that she had programmed into her phone was correct, she held the phone away from her ear and listened to it ring a handful of times before she heard someone pick up.  
  
“ _Hello?”_ _  
_ _  
_ “Sam?”  
  
There was silence on the other end of the phone and Lena shifted the phone to her other ear.  
  
_“Lena?”_  
  
“Hi.”  
  
_“Hi yourself…”_ _  
_  
Lena heard the sound of a door closing and guessed that Sam had just closed her office door. 

“I’m back,” she said, barely able to believe it herself.  
  
_“Welcome back.”_  
  
“It would be a lot better if I wasn’t coming back to send my mother crawling back into whatever hole she crawled out of.”  
  
_“Preaching to the choir,”_ Sam said and let out a beleaguered sigh. “ _I went back and forth on even reaching out to you about it… Have you ever seen a lawyer cry?”_ She groaned. _“Don’t get me wrong, I’m really happy to actually hear your voice but I just wish you were coming back because you wanted to and not because I had to go running for the teacher.”_ _  
_  
“Don’t make it sound like you put a gun to my head, Sam. I always meant to come back and visit…” She was sure that it sounded to Sam just as sincere as someone telling a coworker on their last day to ‘keep in touch’ but Lena truly meant it. “Maybe I needed the kick in the ass.”  
  
_“Maybe.”_

“How’s Ruby?”  
  
_“Living it up in Metropolis,”_ she said and Lena could hear the careful politeness fade from Sam’s voice sounding much more like the Sam she used to know. “ _There’s still a Ruby-shaped hole in our apartment wall from when she got the acceptance letter into university there. Getting her to visit me on weekends is like pulling teeth but she calls almost every night. Sometimes I think she just wants to brag about how much fun she’s having,”_ Sam joked.

 _Is that what I have to look forward to with Fi?_ Lena wondered. “And how are things at L-Corp?”  
  
Sam sighed and Lena could have sworn she could hear the clink of a bottle, wondering if Sam hadn’t just poured herself a drink. _“About the same. We haven’t gone to trial yet but we will. Lillian has all the support she needs to escalate things but she hasn’t yet. I think she’s just having too much fun playing with her food.”_

Lena made a face. “Not that my mother doesn’t love reveling in misery but it doesn’t really sound like her. She’d much rather gloat _after_ she’s won.”  
  
_“I’m not complaining, it’s given us time to try and get a defense cobbled together and for me to get off my high horse and call in the cavalry.”_  
  
Lena laughed, covering her mouth so as not to wake Fi. “Please tell me you’re not talking about me. I’m a decade out of practice when it comes to sparring with my mother. I don’t know if I’ll be the help you’re hoping for but I’ll do what I can.”  
  
_“Either way, I get to see you again. Win-win, in my book.”_

“Spending time with me is not all it's cracked up to be,” Lena said. “You already got me on the plane, no need to keep buttering me up.”  
  
_“Take the compliment,”_ Sam insisted. _“Is the munchkin with you?”_ _  
_ _  
_ “Napping right now, which means I should be too, she’ll have me up half the night I’m sure.”  
  
“ _Like an angel, I’m sure. Don’t let me keep you. I have to fly out to Keystone City tonight to finish closing a deal otherwise I’d want to see you tomorrow. I’ll be there through Halloween. Is it alright with you if we meet up on the first? I can give you a better rundown of what’s happened before you actually have to see Lillian.”_ _  
_ _  
_ “That’s fine. Gives me a couple of days to get settled and Fi would be heartbroken if we didn’t get to go trick-or-treating.”  
  


_“What’s she dressing up as?”_ _  
_ _  
_ “Supergirl,” Lena said, shaking her head a little, still in disbelief that Fi had chosen that costume out of all the others there.  
  
_“She’s going to look so adorable. I’m going to want to see pictures. I would suggest keeping an eye on her though. There are going to be hundreds of Supergirls running around come Halloween night. Don’t want to lose her in the crowd.”_ _  
_ _  
_ Lena smiled. _That sounds about right._ “I always do,” Lena said. “But thanks for the tip.”

 _“Speaking of Supergirl… I know that she’d love to know you were back. She’s still using her same number. If she didn’t drop her phone in a puddle last year she might still be using the same phone too...”_ Sam made a noise that Lena took to mean she found such behavior more confusing than charming. _  
_ _  
_ “I’m not back, Sam,” Lena said patiently. “Not for too long anyway.”  
  
_“All the more reason to call her. I’ll text you later if that’s alright with you…”_ _  
_ _  
_ “Of course, it is, Sam.” She felt a pang of guilt that Sam thought she even needed to ask for permission first. She was Lena’s one remaining link to her old life in National City and while their emails to one another were sparse and never very detailed, she did still consider her a friend although how good of a friend that Lena had been to Sam was extremely debatable which made her all the more determined to clean up Lillian’s mess for her.  
  
_“Go sleep. If Fi is anything like Ruby was at that age, she’ll be up in less than an hour ready to take on the world.”_ _  
_ _  
_ “I will. Have a safe flight, Sam. It’s good to hear your voice again.”  
  
_“I’d say the same thing but there’s a video of you that we show to all the new hires… It’s only been a week or so since I’ve watched it last… But it is good to talk to you again Lena, I missed you.”_  
  
“Missed you too.” Lena ended the call, setting her phone down on the table and stared at it before slipping back into the bedroom and laying down beside Fi. She was sure that what Sam had said was true, Fi’s batteries would be at full charge in no time. Lena didn’t expect to be able to sleep very long but she needed to get what she could now. Get her head a little clearer for what was to come. Just a day ago, her life’s biggest worry was what candy to leave out in front of their house for any would-be trick-or-treaters and now she had to deal with this mess that her mother had made on top of everything else… She closed her eyes, felt herself already starting to drift, and instead of fighting it, let herself sink deeper and was asleep within seconds.  
  


* * *

  
The weather on Halloween was just as cold as the forecast had predicted and Lena and Fi had only walked a block before Lena put the hood of her cloak up in an effort to keep her ears from freezing. She tried to coax Fi into putting on a hat but she had steadfastly refused, crossing her arms in front of her and shaking her head.  
  
“Supergirl doesn’t wear a hat,” she said, prancing along beside Lena, her treat bag banging against her knee.  
  
“How do you know?” Lena asked, still clutching the hat tightly in her right hand.  
  
“Pictures,” she said and held her arms out in front of her running ahead of Lena for a while before falling back to Lena’s side.  
  
_You might have me there,_ Lena thought. “Supergirl also doesn’t catch colds,” Lena said, rubbing her hands together and placing them over Fi’s ears in a bid to warm them up. “If it gets any colder you are putting a hat on. You can be a trendsetter…” She looked around at two other young girls dressed up in Supergirl costumes run past them the other way, giggling to themselves.  
  
“What’s that?” Fi asked.  
  
“Never mind,” Lena said and pointed up to the next house. “Do you want to try this one alone?”  
  
Fi looked up at the house and then back to Lena. “I want to go with you.”  
  
Lena smiled, offered Fi her hand, and walked -hand-in-hand up to the house. She pressed the doorbell and heard movement from the other side of the door.  
  
“What do we say?” Lena whispered when the door opened and a kind-faced woman opened the door beaming at Fi.  
  
“Trick or treat!”  
  
“Adorable,” the woman said. She dropped two small candy bars into Fi’s outstretched treat bag and rummaged around in the bowl beside the door for another one and held it out to Lena.  
  
“Thank you,” Lena said, smiling, “but-”  
  
“Mom.” Fi tugged on Lena’s cloak and stood up on tiptoe to try and whisper to her discreetly. “You have to take it. It’s polite.”  
  
Lena bit back a laugh and nodded. “You’re right, where are my manners?” She caught the woman’s eye who looked incredibly amused at the exchange and winked. She took the candy from her and slid it into one of her pockets. “Thank you,” she said.  
  
“Thank you,” Fi parroted, smiling brightly up at the woman.  
  
“You’re very welcome, both of you.” She waved to Fi and shut the door again, the paper skeleton hanging on the front door looking to do a kind of dance as it shimmied to a stop. Lena turned around to grab Fi’s hand and saw that she was already back on the sidewalk peering into her treat bag like it was a window into Narnia.  
  
“Ready to call it a night already?” Lena teased unable to stop herself from mussing Fi’s hair a little even after she spent so much time combing it straight earlier.  
  
Fi waved a hand out in front of her. “No way.” She skipped ahead, careful not to stray too far ahead, turning back now and again to make sure that Lena was still there.  
  
“No candy until we sit down somewhere,” Lena warned, watching Fi’s arm snake its way into her bag. “You could choke.”  
  
“And then I couldn’t count it all when we go back to the hotel.”  
  
“That too,” Lena said.  
  
They found themselves in a good rhythm for the next half hour. One of them ringing the bell or knocking on the door while Lena took a step back so that Fi could have the brief moment of the spotlight to herself although Fi often did her best to make sure that they shared it.  
  
“My mom’s a _good_ witch,” Fi said, putting extra emphasis on the ‘good’ at the next house they visited.  
  
“How ominous,” the man at the door joked, rubbing a hand over the stubble on his beard.  
  
“No tricks tonight,” Lena assured him. “Say thank you,” she reminded Fi.  
  
“Thank you!” Fi said, bounding off the stoop making the cape on her costume momentarily billow out behind her making a trumpeting noise with her mouth to give herself a short bit of music to fly to.  
  
“Have a Happy Halloween,” Lena said.  
  
“No problem there, all my kids are grown up.” He pointed at Fi who was running up and down the sidewalk with her one free arm outstretched her treat bag unbalancing her somewhat. “She eats any of that and you’re going to have a _long_ Halloween.” He waved cheerfully and shut the door behind him, leaving Lena to watch Fi make herself dizzy.  
  
Lena scooped her up producing a giggle, careful not to lift her too high, spinning her around. “I think I can fly you to one house,” Lena said. _If I don’t trip over this damn cloak and send us both to the ground._  
  
Just as Lena was about to ring the bell her phone rang, feeling it vibrate in her pocket. She instinctively reached into the nearest pocket, realizing that it was in the pocket _under_ her cloak. “Do you want to try and do this one on your own, love” She slipped a hand into her cloak as she tried to dig the phone out of the pocket of her jeans. “I think this might be an important call. Good witch business.”  
  
Fi nodded, switching her treat bag to her other hand and reached up to ring the doorbell.  
  
“Say trick or treat and then say thank you afterward,” Lena reminded her, finally fishing her phone out and slid her thumb over the screen to accept the call.  
  
“Hello? Sam?”  
  
“No, so sorry to disappoint.”  
  
Lena felt her blood run cold and she found herself turning herself away from Fi, stepping off the stoop, yanking her hood off hurriedly. “Mother…”  
  
“You could sound a little happier to hear from me. It’s only been a decade or so.”  
  
“Maybe try calling me again in another ten years and we’ll see where we’re at then.”  
  
“Can you talk?” Lillian asked, completely ignoring Lena’s barb.  
  
“I’m busy,” Lena said, pacing in front of the apartment building.  
  
“With your daughter?”  
  
Lena’s mouth flattened into a thin line and she bit down on the inside of her cheek to stop herself from letting loose whatever poison barb she had ready to toss in her mother’s direction. “You’ve been spying on me? Glad to see that you haven’t changed since I last saw you.”  
  
“I would hardly call keeping tabs on your daughter spying.”  
  
“And when have you ever treated me like a daughter?”  
  
Lillian sighed. “I didn’t call to fight.”  
  
“Whatever you’re trying to do with L-Corp and with Sam, I won’t let you get away with it.”  
  
“That’s why I’m calling…”  
  
“You can-” Lena turned back around to the front door and saw that the stoop was empty, her heart seeming to stop in her chest, the hand clutching her phone clenching into an awkward fist.  
  
“Lena?”  
  
She returned the phone hastily to her pocket, cutting the connection and jogged up the stoop, pounding on the door, not letting up until she saw the shadow of someone on the other side.  
  
“You don’t need to-”  
  
“The girl,” Lena said. “The one who was just here, did you see where she went?”  
  
The scowl on the red-headed woman’s face vanished upon hearing the panic in Lena’s voice and she opened the door wider. “The little girl with the Supergirl costume?”  
  
“Yes,” Lena said.  
  
She pointed down the street. “I think she went that way. She must have walked right past you... If you give me a second to change out of my pajamas I can help you look.”  
  
“Thank you but it’s fine,” Lena said, already back on the sidewalk. She ran, nearly ripping her cloak at the knees while she passed a number of children with their parents, one of them a ghost carrying a jack-o-lantern pail that stared at her as Lena sprinted past.  
  
_Nothing to see here, just the world’s worst fucking mother,_ Lena thought, scolding herself. It would have been easy (and tempting) to blame Lillian for losing track of Fi but it was Lena’s fault. There was the laundry list of excuses she could pull from if she was looking to shirk blame. ‘I just took my eyes off her for a second’, or ‘I told her not to go anywhere’. Just finding herself in such a situation made her face burn with shame and felt hot even against the bitter wind.  
  
“Fi!”  
  
She passed a girl in a Supergirl costume that was at least two heads taller than Fi but that didn’t stop her from bending down low to verify that it wasn’t her.  
  
“Mom?”  
  
“Fi?” Lena caught sight of her just ahead illuminated by the dull yellow glow of a streetlight, put on a burst of speed that tore her cloak at the knee all the way up to her thigh. Hardly noticing, she skidded to a halt in front of Fi, bending down painfully on one knee. “You can’t just run off like that Fi! I know you’re excited but when I looked up and saw you were gone…” She brushed a hand over her eyes, wiping away tears. “You need to stay where I can see you.”  
  
“I’m sorry…” She wrapped her arms around Lena’s side and held tight. “I didn’t mean to run off… But…” She pointed up.  
  
Lena glanced up hastily and saw a cape fluttering in the wind. “There are a lot of Supergirls out tonight, Fi. If you try and chase after each one, I’m never going to-”  
  
“Lena...”  
  
For the second time that night, Lena felt her heart stop in her chest, feeling it begin to beat faster. She kept one hand on Fi’s arm, too afraid that she might run off again and stood up on legs that suddenly felt very shaky.  
  
“She knows your name,” Fi said in a hushed whisper.  
  
_Kara…_  
  
Lena opened her mouth to say something, to say anything when she felt strong arms wrapping her up in an impossibly tight hug. _You changed your hair,_ Lena thought, wrapping her one free arm around Kara, only relinquishing her grip when she felt Kara start to pull away.  
  
“Mom.” Fi tugged at Lena’s cloak and produced a faint tearing sound as the cloak ripped higher up on her leg.  
  
“Yes, love,” Lena said, tearing her gaze away from Kara who was gazing back at her with the same look of wonderment that was on Lena’s face.  
  
“How do you know my mom?” Fi asked, suddenly turning her attention to Kara.  
  
“Your mom?” Kara’s gaze focused briefly on Fi then onto Lena, then quickly to Lena’s left hand and finally back to Fi again. “We’re friends,” she said, bending down onto one knee so that she and Fi were eye-level. “Best friends.”  
  
“Wow,” Fi said, sounding awed. She beamed at Lena and took a step back. “I’m dressed like you,” she said.  
  
“I noticed,” Kara said, smiling right back. “I hope yours is a little more comfortable than mine,” she said and pulled at her suit.  
  
Fi made a face and shook her head which made Kara laugh. “But I still love it. I never want to take it off.”  
  
“Oh boy,” Lena said. “She might mean that,” she whispered to Kara, not wanting to risk planting that idea any deeper into Fi’s head than it might already be.  
  
“What are you doing here?” Kara asked.  
  
“Trick or treating,” Fi answered before Lena even had time to open her mouth to speak.  
  
“I can see that,” Kara lifted Fi’s treat bag, pretending to have trouble. “Heavy,” she said, wiping her brow with the back of her hand. “You must be _really_ strong.”  
  
Fi giggled and shook her head.  
  
“What are _you_ doing here?” Lena asked. National City wasn’t that big but still, the chances of them meeting like this were infinitesimally low.  
  
“Halloween patrol,” Kara said and gestured around. “Not really necessary but I wasn’t getting any trick-or-treaters at my place,” she said in a voice just above a whisper.  
  
“If you still live in a walk-up apartment…” Lena said. Her mouth curved into a sly grin that dulled somewhat when she realized that Kara’s life during her time away was a complete mystery to her. Sam gave her the occasional update but it had been a long while since she had mentioned anything about Kara…  
  
“Mom…”  
  
“Yes, love?” Lena smiled and bent down low when Fi waved her in closer. _If you need to use the bathroom we’ll have to see if the next house doesn’t mind us coming inside for a bit._ She bent her ear close enough so that Fi could whisper into it, wincing a bit when she whispered just a bit _too_ loudly into her ear.  
  
“Can Supergirl come trick or treating with us?”  
  
“I don’t know, Fi…” Lena looked up, sure that Kara had heard Fi, super hearing, or no super hearing. “I’m sure she’s too busy for that…. But there’s no harm in asking.” She cleared her throat, suddenly aware that she might be more nervous to hear Kara’s answer than Fi was.  
  
“Would you like to-”  
  
“Yes. I’d love to.” Kara tapped her ear and smiled at Fi. “Super hearing.” 

“Thank you!” Fi crowed, bouncing up and down, looking very much like she wanted to run circles around them and maybe stopped herself from doing so for Lena’s sake.  
  
“Thank you for inviting me,” Kara said. “It’s an honor.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was originally supposed to be a drabble. It kind of got away from me... Hope you enjoyed it all the same!
> 
> Come say hi! https://inkedroplets.tumblr.com/


	2. Halloween

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  _Baby, it's Halloween  
>  And we can be anything  
> Oh, come on, man  
> We can be anything  
> Baby, it's Halloween  
> There's a last time for everything_  
> -Phoebe Bridgers [Halloween](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bVZTMyQ3SsU)

Lena very reluctantly let go of Fi’s hand when she felt her try and tug free of her grip after they had walked only a few steps, amused and a bit relieved when she offered it to Kara instead who took it without missing a beat, exchanging a quick look with Lena. She nodded and felt her stomach do a nervous kind of shimmy when Kara smiled at her. 

“Do you like my Mom’s costume?” Fi glanced sideways at Lena. “She’s a good witch.”  
  
“Like Glinda,” Kara said.  
  
Fi nodded enthusiastically. “Except mom didn’t want to wear pink.”  
  
“Your mom doesn’t like pink,” Kara said. “But I think she looks nice in it.”

Lena felt her cheeks grow hotter and she gave a nervous little shake of her head.  
  
“Can you ring the bell?” Fi asked Kara, tugging her hand free of Kara’s grip the same way she had done to Lena.  
  
“I sure can.” Kara pressed her finger to the doorbell and Fi slipped behind Kara, hiding behind her cape.  
  
“Trick or treat!” she said, leaping out from behind Kara when the door opened.  
  
The older woman who had answered the door looked at Kara, her gaze lingering there briefly before turning to Fi. “Matching costumes,” she said and beamed at Fi.” She groped out and grabbed a plastic cauldron of candy on a table near the door. “Your daughter’s so cute,” she said, sprinkling a few pieces of candy into Fi’s bag and smiling at both Kara and Lena.  
  
Lena’s eyes widened and she opened her mouth to correct her before thinking better of it. There was very little to be gained by clearing up the misunderstanding except maybe hurting Kara’s feelings and Lena thought she had already done more than enough of that.  
  
“Thank you,” Fi said sweetly, peering inside her bag and looking up at the woman.  
  
“You’re very welcome, sweetheart.” She shut the door and Fi took another peek inside her treat bag.  
  
“I don’t know how you’re going to finish all of that,” Lena said. _She’s definitely going to give herself a stomachache,_ Lena thought. She lifted up her arm and let the cloak slide down her arm a bit so she could peek at her watch. “We probably have time for a few more houses before people start turning their lights off. I'd say you had enough candy but I'd hate to deprive anyone of seeing how cute you look in your costume."  
  
By the time they reached the last house for the night, Lena could tell that Fi was beginning to droop. It could have been jet lag but Lena would have put her money on how much extra energy she was spending lugging that treat bag around with her all night.  
  
“You ready to fly back to the hotel, Supergirl?” Lena asked, bending down and tugging Fi’s bag from her grip without any resistance from Fi. It really was heavy.  
  
Fi blinked sleepily, appeared to weigh her options carefully, and nodded. “I guess so…” She cast a look down the street towards the houses they hadn’t yet visited and let out a little sigh that melted Lena’s heart.  
  
“Do you want me to carry you?” Lena offered, immediately trying to figure the logistics of such a thing with her in a cloak and one arm weighed down with what felt like a twenty-pound sack.  
  
“I can carry her,” Kara said. “If that’s alright with you,” she added quickly. Before Lena was able to answer one way or the other, Fi reached her arms up and took a little running leap the way she did so often with Lena, fully expecting Kara to catch her. Lena started forward, the kind of panic that comes with raising a child who hasn’t quite figured out that they aren’t bulletproof, stealing over her incredibly quickly and vanishing just as fast when Kara scooped Fi up in her arms like it was the most natural thing in the world.  
  
“She’s heavy,” Lena warned, pointing Kara back in the direction of where their hotel was. In another year or so, Lena would struggle to carry her like she was used to doing. _In another year,_ she reminded herself, _she’ll probably not want to be picked up like she does now._ The thought would have been a sobering one if Lena’s mind wasn’t already full of other worries, other thoughts. 

“I _think_ I can manage.” Kara smiled.  
  
“She’s Supergirl,” Fi said, as if Lena needed the reminder, sounding almost admonishing.  
  
“I must have gotten the two of you confused,” Lena said, squinting a bit, leaning in closer as if to get a better look, and kissed Fi on the cheek which got Fi laughing.  
  
The fact that Fi was mostly silent during their walk back to the hotel was proof that she was maybe a bit more tired than she let on. Jet lag had a way of knocking even the most seasoned travelers on their ass and even the endless wellspring of energy that Fi drew from seemed to have a limit. It was Lena who had never felt more awake. She was brimming with a nervous kind of energy that made her feel restless even at the brisk pace they were walking. Seeing Kara again, running into her after so long… Her brain (and more importantly, her heart) still needed time to process everything, although she had ten years to do that already and she still felt like that hadn’t been enough time.  
  
After ten years, the silence should have been uncomfortable or perhaps even unbearable considering how they had parted… But to Lena, it felt peaceful. Or it might have simply been the calm before the storm, either way, Lena wanted to enjoy it as much as she possibly could until then.

“Are you staying long?”  
  
Lena shook her head. “A week, maybe two.” She looked at Fi who was resting her head on Kara’s shoulder, her eyes looking no less inquisitive than they ever did even with her so close to nodding off, and turned her head away from the both of them to utter a very quiet “tell you later,” that she knew Kara would have no trouble picking up with her super hearing. _What later?_ A voice asked her.  
  
“Later then,” Kara said softly.  
  
“Later, what?” Fi lifted her head off of Kara’s shoulder a bit before letting it rest there again.  
  
“Later than I thought it is,” Kara said, smiling. “You must be tired.”  
  
“A _little,_ ” Fi said. “But not too tired for a bedtime story,” she added.  
  
“Of course not. I don’t think you’d ever be too tired for that.”  
  


* * *

Fishing the hotel keycard from her pocket as they stepped out of the elevator, Lena fumbled with it a bit, passing it in front of the sensor and holding the door open for Kara and Fi before stepping in herself.

Kara lifted up Fi high enough over her head to coax a sleepy giggle out of her before she set her down next to her. “Last stop of the night.”  
  
“Let’s get you cleaned up and into your pajamas,” Lena said, rummaging around in the smaller of the two black suitcases pushed up flush against the wall and pulling out a pair of pajamas covered in moons and stars. “Then one story if you can keep your eyes open that long.”  
  
Fi reached behind her, wrapping the cape of her costume around her like it was a security blanket. “I could sleep in this…”  
  
“You could also sleep in these,” Lena said. “Even Supergirl wears pajamas.” She jerked her head towards Kara and exchanged a quick look with Kara.  
  
“Yup,” Kara said. “I don’t have a pair with me right now but when I go home-”  
  
“You could borrow some from my mom.”  
  
“She’ll put on her pajamas when she goes home.”  
  
Fi looked up at Kara for a moment before shuffling over to Lena and tugged at her arm, waving her in again to lean closer.  
  
This time, Lena was smart enough not to lean in as close as she did the time before and saved herself having to jerk back when Fi began whispering just a bit too loudly in her ear.  
  
“Can Supergirl read me my bedtime story?”  
  
“She’s not a genie, love,” Lena said reproachfully. “We’ve taken up enough of her time.” She looked up at Kara apologetically. There were so many things that she still felt that she had to apologize to Kara for that it felt strange to need to add having an overly persistent daughter to the list.  
  
“If it’s alright with your mom,” Kara said. “I’d love to read you a bedtime story.”  
  
“Of course, it’s alright with me…”  
  
“It’s alright with me too,” Fi added  
  
“How fortuitous,” Lena said, shaking her head a little looking amused.  
  
“What’s fortuitous mean?” Fi looked quizzically up at Lena.  
  
“It means you’re lucky. Let’s get you out of your costume and into your PJs.”  
  
“Supergirl needs pajamas too if she’s going to read me a story.”  
  
“It’s what we do at home,” Lena clarified when she saw the slightly puzzled expression on Kara’s face. Their bedtime routine varied day to day, sometimes they would watch TV together and some nights Fi would draw while Lena would read next to her but they ended each night the same way. Both of them in their pajamas before Fi would pick a book to read before bed. “You don’t have to wear them,” Lena said. “But _if_ you want to. There’s a pair in that suitcase,” she said pointing to the larger of the two.”  
  
Ushering Fi into the bathroom she helped her unclip the cape of the costume draping it over her arm like a waiter might a serviette. “You really should take a shower but I think just washing your face will do.” Fi could wash up on her own but Lena did need to do a spot check for bubbles now and again, sometimes finding a few behind her ears.  
  
Clambering up onto the small step stool in front of the sink, Fi turned on the tap and splashed water on her face, getting a considerable amount on the sink as she did. “Why didn’t you tell me you were best friends with Supergirl?” she asked, working some soap into a lather before closing her eyes tightly and scrubbing her face.  
  
Lena cast an eye at the closed bathroom door feeling a little inchworm of guilt creep into her stomach. “Well…” Lena said carefully. “I’ve been away from National City for a long time now. Ten years.”  
  
“That’s a _long_ time,” Fi said, her voice slightly muffled while she dried her face with a towel.  
  
“It is,” Lena agreed. “And after all that time away… I wasn’t sure if Supergirl and I were still friends…”  
  
“Oh,” Fi said, seemingly satisfied with Lena’s answer. Then is Supergirl friends with Kara too?”  
  
There was a crashing sound from the other room that drew both of their attention, Fi whipping some water onto the mirror and onto Lena’s cloak. Lena stared at the closed door for a moment, her cheeks reddening. _Were you listening?_  
  
“They are,” Lena said, thinking that was the closest to the actual truth. “Arms up,” Lena said and helped Fi into her pajamas letting her do the buttons on her own.  
  
“Can we see Kara before we go home?”  
  
“ _Maybe,_ love.” _Technically you’ve already met her._  
  
“She must miss you,” she said matter-of-factly.  
  
“And why do you think that?”  
  
“Because if I didn’t see you for ten years I’d miss you even more than this much.” Fi stretched her arms out wide and smiled up at Lena.  
  
“I’d miss you, even more, my treasure.” Lena kissed her forehead and pulled her into a hug. “I’ll let you brush your teeth. Make sure to get the ones in the far back or they’ll get lonely.”  
  
Fi nodded. “I will."  
  
Lena exited the bathroom and was more than a little surprised to see Kara sitting on the sofa wearing her polka dot silk pajamas.  
  
Kara stood up at once when she saw Lena. There were a couple of inches of bare ankle that showed when she did, the pajamas just a touch too small for her. “I guess I could have flown home and got my pajamas but-”  
  
Lena shook her head. “You’ve already gone out of your way enough. Sorry that they’re a little small…”  
  
Kara stretched out her arms so that the sleeves slid further up her wrists. “They’re still comfy.”  
  
“I should change too.” She pointed to the bedroom. “I’ll be right back.”  
  
“Take your time.”  
  
“I would but I’m afraid Fi will come out before that and rope you into never leaving,” Lena said.  
  
Kara giggled. “She does have a way of weaponizing that cuteness, doesn’t she?”  
  
“You have no idea.”  
  
Lena disappeared into the bedroom and re-emerged a couple of minutes later wearing a charmeuse caftan, her hair done up in a messy high ponytail. Fi was sitting next to Kara on the sofa, her treat bag laying on the coffee table with a few pieces stacked up into a neat little pile.  
  
“Taking inventory?” Lena asked.  
  
“ _Arranging,”_ Fi replied.  
  
“That can wait until tomorrow, I think. You still need to pick out a story.” Luckily she had only packed a few books to take with them. The huge shelves at home were full to bursting with books and not only did it take Fi sometimes an eternity to pick a book, but she had also quite recently discovered that picking a chapter book had the added benefit of delaying her bedtime a considerable amount.  
  
“I already picked.” Fi held up the book on her lap and Lena knew at once what one she had picked. It was Lena's own well-worn copy of _Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland._ Fi had been the one to pick it out from all the others on the shelf and it was what they had been working their way through for the past week.

 _I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt that you just happened to pick the only chapter book we brought,_ Lena thought. She would have probably tried to get Fi to pick something shorter like _Goodnight Moon_ if she didn’t look like she were already half-asleep despite her valiant efforts to stay awake.  
  
“Let’s get you tucked in,” Lena said, scooping Fi up off the couch, book and all. She made a waving gesture with her free hand for Kara to follow her. The stubborn part of her brain, the logical no-nonsense part that remained skeptical of the stranger things in the world despite everything she had seen still wasn’t quite ready to believe that what was happening was real. _It is all a very vivid dream,_ the clipped, irritable voice that spoke for that part of herself warned her. 

As if she could read Lena’s mind, Kara chose that moment to reach out and take the book from Fi, her hand brushing featherlight against Lena’s shoulder as she did, which was enough to get her heart thumping double time for a few seconds.  
  
Once Fi was tucked in and her pillow was appropriately fluffed, Lena sat down on the other side of the bed instead of right beside Fi like usual. Tonight, that spot was reserved for Kara. Whatever Kara’s plans for the evening were, Lena was willing to bet that she had never believed that she would ever be shanghaied into reading someone a bedtime story.  
  
“You don’t have to do the voices,” Fi said, the expression on her face in complete opposition with her words.  
  
“Oh, I _have_ to do the voices,” Kara said, plucking the bookmark from between the pages and setting it down on the small bedside table.  
  
Kara made it through half a chapter before Fi began to nod but wasn’t completely out until Kara was closing in on the end of the chapter. Lena watched her shut the book gently, sandwiching the bookmark delicately between the pages and setting it down on the bedside table before they both slipped from the room, Lena turning the knob before shutting the door so that the latch didn’t catch.  
  
Lena turned to Kara, still not sure what she should say to her even though she had spent the last three hours trying to figure that out. She opened her mouth to maybe apologize, maybe even tell Kara how much she missed her but what came tumbling out of her mouth was completely different.

“Coffee?” The offer is more non sequitur than anything else and Lena wouldn’t have been surprised if Kara looked back at her confused or even a little angry at how glib it must have sounded to her. _We haven’t seen each other for over a decade and the best thing that I can come up with is to offer her coffee._  
  
“I’d love some.” 

* * *

Ten minutes later, both of them were sitting on the couch, not quite on opposite ends with an identical cup sitting in front of them. Lena watched a tiny curl of steam rise up off of hers, gathered what little courage she had been able to scrape together, and opened her mouth hoping that her second attempt at making conversation would go a lot better than her first.  
  
“Thank you for coming with us tonight,” Lena said. Her gaze flickered over to the bedroom and then back to Kara. “You made Fi’s night. Probably her entire year. Hard to top trick-or-treating with Supergirl.”  
  
Kara smiled. “Trick-or-treating with Lena Luthor,” she countered. “That might just do it.”  
  
“Not when I’m the one who makes her eat all her vegetables, no exceptions, not even for kale.”  
  
“I take it back then,” Kara said, smiling at Lena over the top of her coffee cup. The smile seemed to flicker, then fade and then return brighter than ever looking to Lena’s eye a bit _too_ bright. “How old is she?”  
  
“Seven,” Lena said. “Almost eight. If you’re not careful you’re going to get an invitation to her birthday party.”  
  
“Don’t know how I could miss that,” Kara said, catching Lena’s eye before dropping her gaze to her lap. “And her dad?”  
  
“Her dad?” Lena noticed Kara look down at her left hand again and understood at once, again, a little slow on the uptake. Lena shook her head and set her coffee cup back on the table. “I adopted Fi three years ago.” Even to her own ears, it sounded strange. Lena Luthor. A mother. If it sounded strange to Kara it didn’t show on her face, merely waiting, maybe hoping that Lena would elaborate more. 

“The place I moved to in Ireland, it’s a small village, even smaller than Smallville. Everyone is friendly enough there but nobody tries all that hard to get too close.” She smiled. “Almost the perfect place for someone like me. I’d run into Fi’s mother at the bookstore there now and again. The selection is somewhat lacking but it’s quaint. I liked spending time there more than I liked shopping sometimes. She and I would never chat long.” She gave a kind of lopsided smile and shrugged her shoulders a bit as if saying ‘it is _me_ after all’.  
  
“We had the same taste in books and I’d sometimes recommend a few and she would do the same for me.” It was tempting to leave out details. Not lies per se, but it would be a step down a perilous slope that Lena knew from experience was a slippery one. “Sometimes she’d be the only person that I’d talk to for days… weeks at a time. Her and Fi, of course.” She saw the frown forming on Kara’s face and she waved a hand out in front of her. The last thing she wanted was Kara’s pity but she did want to be honest with her. They both owed one another that much at least.  
  
“And then I didn’t see them for weeks and when I started asking around about them I learned that there had been an accident. I wanted to find the family that would take care of Fi, to offer them condolences or money so that they wouldn’t have to worry about how they would raise a child in addition to mourning for the family they lost. But Fi’s father wasn’t part of the picture and she had no family to speak of. I found out she was in an orphanage a few hours away…”  
  
Lena cleared her throat, picking up her coffee cup again and pouring a bit more into her cup before taking a measured sip. “Sometimes when I was really young, right after the Luthors adopted me and I guess for a few more years after that, I liked to imagine what it would be like if I were adopted by a different family. Not so rich and not so cold. I wondered how different things could have turned out that way… But that was a little girl’s fantasy. Like daydreaming about getting a letter from Hogwarts or that you’ll wake up with superpowers and a destiny waiting for you to come and seize it.” She took another small sip of coffee and smiled brighter. “But look who I’m talking to.”  
  
Kara smiled and glanced away looking somewhat pleased but pensive all the same. 

“But then you grow up a little and you realize how many children stay in foster care until they’re old enough to leave it… I wanted to make sure that didn’t happen to Fi. I drove down to the orphanage. I thought that I could give a generous enough donation and get wheels turning that would ensure she would find a good home.” Lena sighed. “Maybe not my finest moment,” she admitted.  
  
“You had the best of intentions,” Kara said, her voice firm.  
  
“That could be my middle name,” Lena said and smiled a bit wider when she saw the way the corners of Kara’s mouth twitched when she said it. “When I got there I asked to see the person in charge. She was on a call and while I waited I asked if I could see Fi. I don’t know why I did. I was almost a stranger. The strange bookshop woman that her mom would chat with from time to time.The woman who sometimes bought her sweets.  
  
“She was sitting in the playroom by the window with a book open on her lap and she reminded me so much of myself when I lost my mom… It brought all those bad memories rushing to the surface. And even though I knew how she must be feeling, how hurt she was, I had no idea what I could say to her to give her any modicum of comfort. But when she saw me she came running to me and I scooped her up into a hug and my heart just broke. I knew I couldn’t leave her there and that I couldn’t just throw money at the problem like I thought I could.”  
  
“So you adopted her,” Kara said.  
  
Lena nodded. “Not the easiest thing in the world to do but money has a way of cutting through bureaucratic red tape like a hot knife through butter. I know how ridiculous it must sound, how it must look... “ She pointed at herself. “I’m probably the least qualified person in the world to be a mother.”  
  
“You’re wonderful with her, Lena.”  
  
“ _She’s_ wonderful,” Lena insisted.  
  
“You won’t get any argument from me,” Kara said.

Silence closed in on them again, this one was a little less pleasant than the one from earlier. If they hadn’t opened Pandora’s box by now they had certainly cracked the lid which meant about the same.  
  
It was enticing for Lena to remain silent, to let Kara do the heavy lifting and be the one to be the vanguard, to find a way to navigate their quagmire of friendship or at least what was left of it. It would be easy and it would be like old times, it would also be wrong.  
  
“We read your articles,” Lena said, and when Kara gave her a slightly puzzled look she elaborated. “The one you wrote two months ago on police corruption in Hub City was amazing. I had to clean it up a little bit to read it to Fi but she got the gist of it… I think.”  
  
“Oh.” Kara looked pleased and nervously tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. “I’m really proud of how the article turned out.”  
  
“You should be.”  
  
Kara beamed at her, that thousand-watt smile of hers that had a way of being both warm and disarming. “You told Fi about me?” She cleared her throat and looked away briefly. “I heard you and Fi talking earlier…”  
  
“She hasn’t quite mastered her indoor voice just yet,” Lena said, “and of course I did, Kara. She doesn’t know _everything_ but she knows _almost_ everything.”  
  
“Like what?”  
  
“Now you sound like, Fi,” Lena teased, almost taken aback at the earnestness of Kara’s question. “She knows that you were my first friend here when I moved to National City, my first best friend ever. That you’re an amazing reporter, obviously. That you eat _way_ too many potstickers in one sitting than anyone should. That you hate kale almost as much as her and that you have an older sister and that you’re both adopted. Pretty much everything except the whole saving the world thing.”  
  
“She was right,” Kara said, her hands clasped together clumsily, wringing together nervously.  
  
“Right about what?”  
  
“I missed you,” she said simply, tears beginning to fall as quickly and suddenly as a summer storm. “I missed you every day, Lena. I thought that I heard your heartbeat tonight but I’d fooled myself so many times before after you left that I couldn't trust myself… But you’re really here…”  
  
_I did too, Kara..._  
  
Lena slid closer to Kara on the couch, closing some of the careful distance that the two had put between themselves when they had sat down. She hesitated, feeling as if she were teetering on the edge of some impossibly high precipice before forcing herself to leap. “I missed you too… Even when I didn’t feel like I deserved to.” She pulled Kara into a hug that was returned almost at once. Kara’s head nestled against the crook of Lena’s neck setting off a depth charge in the pit of her stomach, shyness, and timidity all rolled into one.  
  
Her breath didn’t hitch in her chest even though there were tears. She could feel them falling against Kara’s shoulder, embarrassed and a little relieved when Kara didn’t shy away from them.

“Are you… Are you still angry with me? Are you still hurting?” Kara’s voice comes out ever so slightly muffled but still plenty audible. Lena’s hearing couldn’t hold a candle to Kara’s but Fi could not only be shy but could also mumble with the best of them making Lena well-versed in deciphering the unintelligible.  
  


Those two questions were tied together, mutually inclusive, entangled into one, and from the way that Kara’s grip on her tightened, Lena could guess that she was expecting one answer while hoping for another. They’re questions that Lena used to ask herself almost daily, never really expecting her answer to change but _hoping_ that it might. _Are you angry? Yes. Are you hurting? God, yes._  
  
“No, Kara. I’m not angry with you anymore. I haven’t been for a long time now…” She had never believed that she would have been rid of that anger entirely. Not when it burned so hot and it seemed to become an essential part of herself, poisoning her and keeping her alive at the same time. There had been days that her anger had seemed to vanish only to reappear again like the swallows returning to Capistrano until one day it had gone and never returned. 

The hurt however was something more ineffaceable. It was something that Lena had learned to live with. Their parting had left deep scars and even after all the years that had passed since then they still ached. 

“Are you still angry with me?”  
  
Kara shook her head against Lena’s shoulder. “No, I’m not angry, Lena. Not even a little bit.” She broke their embrace, wiped at the tears that were still falling, and clutched Lena’s hands as if Lena might suddenly disappear if she didn’t. “Why didn’t you come back?”  
  
Lena bit her lip and shook her head. “I couldn’t,” she said, shame bleeding into her voice, her eyes flicking up and away from Kara. “I could never trust myself again after what I did to you. The best thing, the only thing that I could do was to stay away from you and everyone else. I hated leaving like I did but I knew you would be alright. You had Alex and Eliza and Nia… You had everybody that mattered and I knew you would be alright.”  
  
“I didn’t have you... “ Kara blinked, two fat tears gliding down her cheeks. “How could I ever be alright without you?” She sniffled and pulled Lena into another embrace, tighter this time, just short of bone-creaking.  
  
“If you wanted,” Lena said carefully, weighing each word before she said it. “If you could forgive me, we could start over…”  
  
“I don’t want to start over,” Kara whispered, her head resting on Lena’s shoulder. “I don’t want to pretend that everything we had didn’t happen, Lena. I just want you back in my life. Is that okay?”  
  
The logical thing, the careful thing to do would be to mull over Kara's question. For both their sakes it would have been best to approach it carefully and to examine it from every angle imaginable before coming to a decision but feeling Kara's arms around her, feeling her tears, all she can hear is her own heart screaming at her to take another leap.  
  
"Nothing would make me happier."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading!
> 
> https://inkedroplets.tumblr.com/


	3. When Pigs Fly

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _No longer a danger to herself or others  
>  She made up her mind and laced up her shoes  
> Yelled down the hall, but nobody answered  
> So she walked outside without an excuse_
> 
> _I would do anything you want me to  
>  I would do anything for you  
> I would do anything, I would do anything  
> Whatever you want me to do, I will do_  
> -Phoebe Bridgers [Graceland Too](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cTG0dakpDko)

There were more tears. _A lot_ more tears and Kara knew that later on when she had some time to herself there would be even more. Of course, there would but that was later and here with Lena was now and that was all that mattered. That was all that had ever mattered except Kara had figured that out just a bit too late the last time… She didn’t have any plan on making that mistake again.

There was more coffee too. Purely for Lena’s benefit, of course. Kara had never felt more awake although she was more than happy to let Lena top her mug up and watch the little curls of steam chuff upward and disappear into nothing.

When Lena sat back down beside her their knees banged together and Kara scooted closer so that their shoulders were touching. She could hear Lena’s heartbeat thrum faster, change tempo in time with her own from andante to allegretto like the flutter of a bird’s wing. As appealing as the idea of another hug sounded to Kara, she eyed the steaming coffee cup clutched delicately in Lena’s right hand and had a premonition of disaster. She opted instead to take Lena’s free hand and hold it tight, interlocking their fingers.

“I’m actually back because of a problem at L-Corp,” Lena said, setting her coffee cup back down on the table and curling her body so that she was facing Kara. She wrinkled her nose and for the first time that night, Kara saw something resembling a frown cross Lena’s face. “It’s my mother…” She made a face as if to say, _of course, it is_ and surprised Kara when she started laughing. “I guess some things never change.”

Kara’s smile widened and she gave a delicate shake of her head. “No,” she agreed. “Some things never change.” She ran her index finger around the rim of her coffee cup. “I still don’t like kale,” she joked, “despite all of Alex’s efforts to make it more palatable and,” she said shyly, “you still look so-”

“Tired?” Lena suggested giving her head a little shake as if this was the only answer that made sense.

“-beautiful.”

“Lena spluttered and slopped a little coffee over the rim of her cup. It trembled a little in her hand and Kara heard her heart speed up like it had just heard the crack of a starter’s pistol. “I _did_ retire,” Lena said, setting her coffee cup next to Kara’s on the table. “Probably did wonders for my skin,” she joked, her voice sounding slightly dreamy, her gaze drifting to and fro before their eyes met again.

“Do you miss it? L-Corp, I mean.”

“Well,” Lena said and Kara watched her glance back towards the room where Fi was sleeping. “I only _semi-retired._ I’m still doing my own research but mostly on small-scale projects and I’ll sometimes consult on some of the projects going on at L-Corp. I don’t miss the board meetings or business dinners. But I miss my lab and I know it makes me sound crazy but I kind of miss working all night on a project.” Lena giggled. “Falling asleep on the couch in my office and somehow having enough energy to do it all again the next night. You stopping by in the mornings and bringing me coffee might have helped.”

“You were right on the way to work,” Kara said, the smile on her face turning a bit more sly.

“It was in the complete opposite direction from CatCo,” Lena said, laughing. “I always felt so guilty when you came rushing in some mornings with a coffee for me but I never could force myself to actually tell you to stop.”

“Free coffee is hard to turn down,” Kara said and nodded wisely. "Even for a billionaire."

“Even for a billionaire," Lena agreed, smiling. "I was afraid if I told you to stop coming by you might actually do it,” Lena said shyly. “I had never met anybody that was always so happy to see me, especially in the mornings.” She stuck out the tip of her tongue and gave Kara a bump with her shoulder that sent a shiver racing down Kara’s spine. “I would have felt _slightly_ less guilty if I knew you could fly though,” she teased.

Kara felt the uncomfortable prickling of guilt working its way down into the pit of her stomach and found herself searching Lena’s grin for any sign of hurt, knowing just how good that Lena was at hiding it. “I know I should have told you so much sooner, Lena, I-”

“Kara…,” Lena said, cutting her off. “I already told you that I’m not angry anymore.” She gave Kara’s hand a reassuring squeeze and Kara felt the pressure building in her chest abate. “What you said about not wanting to start over… I don’t want that either. I don’t want to throw away everything we’ve shared, the good or bad but I don’t want to dwell on the bad any longer… I’ve done that too much already. Deal?”

“Deal.” Kara held up her free hand and extended her pinky for Lena to shake with her own. When she did, Kara tugged Lena’s hand into hers and brought them both into her lap. “There’s so much I want to tell you, Lena… So much I want to ask you but I don’t know where to start.”

“Start anywhere,” Lena said. “We’ll wind up in the same place eventually,” she teased.

Kara nodded shyly. _I hope that’s true Lena, I really, really do._

Kara lost track of the time. Both of them did. She had been in the middle of telling Lena about the new article she was in the middle of writing when Lena lifted her head up off of Kara’s shoulder and pointed out towards the balcony. Kara turned her head and could see the first streaks of dawn beginning to lighten up the sky.

“We talked all night,” Kara said, sounding both guilty and elated at the same time.

“We had a lot to talk about.”

“Still do,” Kara said softly. One night certainly wouldn’t be enough for them to say all that they wanted to one another but it had been as good a start as any but Kara couldn’t stop herself from wishing that the night had lasted a tiny bit longer.

“I’m free almost every night,” Lena joked. “After Fi’s story, of course. You’re lucky she didn’t try and rope you into reading her another chapter. Her puppy-dog eyes? Definitely should be classified as deadly weapons,” she said in mock seriousness.

“We could always have the DEO take a look at her. Make sure she’s not endangering anybody with all that cuteness.”

“Speaking of the DEO, how’s Alex?”

“Alex is doing great. Still with the DEO but she stepped down from being director three, no, four years ago.”

“She’s not?” Lena asked, sounding surprised. “I assumed she’d be running the place by now.”

“She might have been if she wanted to.” That was the trajectory that Kara thought her sister would continue on. Not that Alex had ever been gunning for such a position but in Kara’s eyes that had made her a far better candidate than anyone intentionally seeking out the position. “Her and Kelly got married… Oh geez, eight years ago?” Kara laughed. “It doesn’t seem like that long ago.” With Lena back in her life, pressed up beside her on a couch, looking back at the past felt like she was looking at it through both ends of a pair of binoculars. Some events seemed closer than they really had been and some seemed even more distant.

“I had no idea,” Lena said. She reached for her cup and took a sip of the cold coffee that remained, made a face that Kara imitated quite uncannily, and set it back down again with a clatter.

“They have two albums full of photos and a wedding video that they break out every anniversary if you want to see. Makes me cry every time. They’re actually in the process of adopting right now,” Kara said and smiled somewhat wistfully, her thoughts turning briefly to Fi. “They’d been planning on it for a while now, just waiting to get all their ducks in a row.”

“I guess that’s easier to do when you trade in your holster for a pocket protector,” Lena joked. 

“You’re still here!” Fi crowed, startling the both of them. She stood in the bedroom doorway rubbing sleep from her eyes, still looking like she was halfway between the waking world and the land of nod not quite sure which direction to commit to just yet. “Did you stay the whole night?”

Kara blushed a little and nodded. “I did. I was talking with your mom and I lost track of the time.” That wasn’t the first time that had happened and Kara sincerely hoped that it wouldn’t be the last either. They had found a way to heal a wound that Kara had once believed to be a mortal one but the details of just what that meant for both of them were still up in the air. _Still deep in negotiations,_ Kara thought.

“How did you sleep, my treasure?” Lena patted the spot next to her and Fi hopped up on the couch next to her, holding tightly onto her arm.

“I slept good, but I’m hungry,” Fi said, her gaze falling on her treat bag still laying on the coffee table that Kara and Lena were using as a footrest.

“How about we order breakfast,” Lena offered. She moved one of her legs so that it formed a kind of barricade between Fi’s treat bag and her. She _stretched_ for a paper menu still propped up neatly on the counter beside the couch and just barely snagged it between her fingers.

“Can Supergirl have breakfast with us?” Fi asked, this time not bothering to whisper in Lena’s ear this time.

“Unless she has somewhere else she needs to be…”

“I’m right where I want to be,” Kara said, catching Lena’s eye, noticing the color rising in Lena’s face and felt her stomach do a nervous flip, leaning over to get a better look at the menu.

“What do you like to eat for breakfast?” Fi asked, peeking at Kara from behind Lena’s arm.

Kara tapped a finger against her chin. “That’s a tough one because I like to eat a lot.” She patted her stomach and grinned when Fi started to giggle, hiding her face behind Lena’s arm.

“Bit of an understatement,” Lena said under her breath, her lips curved into a playful smile.

“Let’s see,” Kara said and ran a finger down the menu. “Let’s try and find something I don’t like, I think that will be easier.” She worked her way down the list shaking her head, looking more at Fi than the menu. “No,” she said, looking disappointed. “I think I like everything here… Wait.” She tapped the menu. “I found something. Salad,” she said in a tone usually reserved for when one receives socks at Christmas. “Not just salad, _kale_ salad,” she said and shivered.

“That’s the _brunch_ menu, I don’t know if that counts,’ Lena said, laughing. 

“Mom likes salads,” Fi said, beaming up at Lena before leaning over her and beckoning Kara to get closer. “I don’t like them either,” she said, giving her head a little shake while she snuck a peek up at Lena who had the sense to pretend that she hadn’t heard.

Kara used her hand to turn an imaginary key in front of her mouth and winked at Fi before looking up at Lena who was looking back at her with a curious expression on her face.

Twenty minutes later, there was a knock at the door that sent Fi scurrying back to the bedroom at a speed that made Lena grimace and chase after her. “How she doesn’t constantly have scraped knees is a miracle,” she muttered, shaking her head. “Do you mind getting the door, Kara?”

“Already on it,” she called over her shoulder, floating over to it and touching down onto the floor before opening the door.

“There’s another cart,” the balding man on the other side of the door said, gesturing behind him, waiting for the go-ahead to push the first one through. This was said with all the professionalism one could expect when renting one of the more expensive rooms in an already pricey hotel but Kara could see the way his eyes scanned the room, likely expecting to find several more people in the room to explain the enormous breakfast order Lena had placed.

“I’ll grab the second one?” Kara suggested.

“That’s quite alright,” he said, pushing the first cart inside before hurrying back out and pushing the second one in as well. “Please enjoy your stay and your breakfast,” he said. He flashed Kara a congenial smile and shut the door behind him.

“I talked her down to just the cape,” Lena said, Fi balanced on her shoulders still in her pajamas with the cape from her Supergirl costume clipped to her PJ’s.

Kara grinned. “Those famous negotiation skills at work.”

“Oh please,” Lena said, lifting Fi off of her shoulders and swooping her down towards the ground and back up before setting her down. “Give me another stubborn executive any day of the week.” She pointed at Fi, still smiling. “She could give them all a run for her money.”

The kaleidoscope of butterflies in Lena’s stomach had been dead set on fluttering about with no end in sight but that hadn’t stopped her from eating a scone from the plate of pastries on one of the carts and munching on a pair while she listened to Fi ask Kara far too many questions and for Kara to answer every single one without fail in between bites of her food. _You’re so good with her,_ she thought, watching the both of them with her chin propped up on her hand. She had reached for another muffin and veered her hand towards the fruit bowl instead. She had made the mistake in the past about overdoing it on carbs after an allnighter and nodded off during a board meeting and was in no rush to repeat it.

“That’s not a napkin, love,” Lena said, watching Fi out of the corner of her eye, fighting the urge to laugh when Fi jumped a little, letting go of her cape and reaching for a napkin that Kara held out to her. “If you’re going to have that on all day-”

“I am,” Fi said, dabbing at her mouth daintily to wipe some powdered sugar off her face.

“-then we should try and keep it as clean as possible. At least until we see Sam.”

“At L-Corp?”

Lena nodded. “At L-Corp. You’ll like her, I promise and I’m sure she’ll like your cape.”

“Definitely,” Kara agreed, standing up suddenly, rattling her utensils when she banged her knee on the table.

“Trouble?” Lena asked.

“Fire,” Kara said. She took a step towards the balcony, came to a shuddering halt, and looked down at herself. “Pajamas,” she muttered. “That would have been embarrassing.” She smiled sheepishly and appeared to disappear for a moment, reappearing dressed in her Supergirl suit. “If you’re not too tired,” Kara said. “And I’d completely understand if you are… But if you’re not, could we maybe have dinner tonight? The three of us?”

_The three of us…_

“Yes,” Fi said, her forkful of waffle halfway to her mouth dripping syrup onto the table.

“I think she was talking to me, love, but, yes. That sounds great. If you’re not-”

“I’m not busy,” Kara said quickly. “And I _really_ want to stay but…”

“I know… Go be a hero,” Lena said, lifting Fi up out of her chair. “Wish her luck, love.”

“Good luck!” Fi cried. “Be careful too…”

“I will,” Kara said. “I promise. See you tonight! Six-ish?”

“Tonight,” Lena agreed, waving with her free hand and felt her heart leap into her throat when Kara smiled at her.  
  
"It's a date," Kara said, blushing a little before she flew out onto the balcony and disappeared.

Lena felt Fi start to wriggle like a greased fish in her arms and set her down, watching her run to the window and stare up at the sky, what remained of her breakfast all but forgotten. Smiling to herself, she walked over to where Fi was at the window, knelt down beside her, and planted a kiss on her cheek.

* * *

The L-Corp building was exactly the same as Lena remembered it and seeing it pop into view as they drove closer to it, she felt, not for the first time since arriving in National City that she had somehow stepped back into the past. There was a sea of faces that Lena had never seen before filtering in and out of the building but one familiar one that she hadn’t expected to see, at least not outside her office.

“Sam? What are you doing out here?"

“Lena!” The slight frown on her face vanished as if by magic and she raised a hand to greet her, heels clicking against the cement while she hurried over to her. “I was just texting you,” she said coming to a stop in front of them. She had her arms opened for a hug when she locked eyes with Fi, immediately dropping down so that she was eye-level with Fi. “Hi.” 

“Hi,” Fi said, using Lena as partial cover, peering out at Sam.

Sam looked up at Lena, one hand over her heart. “Lena, she's so adorable. Oh my God.”

“Don’t I know it,” she said, smiling proudly. “Remember I told you about Sam, love?”

Fi nodded. “She took your job at L-Corp.”

“Took _over_ ,” Lena corrected, fighting back a laugh. “There’s a difference, love.”

“I _kind of_ took it,” Sam joked, nodding. “Your mom can have it back any time she wants.”

“No take-backs,” Lena said, opening her arms up and accepting the tight hug, returning it with the same gusto. “I missed you, Sam,” she said, wishing that there was a better way to convey her feelings, hoping that her hug might get her message across a bit more than her words ever could.

“I missed you too.” Sam held her at arm’s length surveying her with Lena doing the same.

“What’s the verdict?” Lena asked.

“You look tired,” Sam teased. “Does it have anything to do with me begging you to fly all the way here to help me? Help me Obi-Wan Kenobi. You’re my only hope.”

“I was up all night,” Lena said.

“Jet lag?” Sam made a face and patted her arm apologetically.

“With Supergirl,” Fi said, coming out from behind Lena, already over the initial bout of shyness she almost always had around strangers.

“With Supergirl? Really?”

Fi nodded. “We had breakfast together too.”

Sam’s eyes went wide, her smile looking a bit too sly for Lena’s liking. “I want to hear all about that, I really do but I need to tell you something first.” Sam braced herself against the wind and grimaced. "Kind of why I'm freezing my butt off out here. Your…” Sam started, glancing down at Fi. “Lillian is upstairs. Waiting for you.”

“How the h- heck does she know I’m here,” Lena said, catching herself just in time to stop herself from swearing. The surprise phone call out of the blue the night before had been bad enough but knowing that her mother was keeping close enough tabs on her to intercept her at L-Corp was a step even beyond that.

“No idea, but she’s waiting up in meeting room B for you. If you want to avoid her I suggest just heading back to the motel and waiting it out. She’ll get bored eventually and we can hash out a plan later."

“Tempting,” Lena said, hoisting Fi up and holding her tight to her. “But if I avoid her here she’ll show up at the hotel.” She had checked in privately at the hotel but she was under no illusion that would be enough to keep Lillian from finding her if she was properly motivated. “I need to help Sam with that work problem. It’s really important but it will be _really_ boring too,” she said, not at all worried about overselling that particular point. _Boring and incredibly horrible,_ Lena thought. “Do you mind staying with Sam for just a bit while I take care of it?”

“Will you be very long?” Fi asked, looking unsure.

Lena shook her head adamantly. “Not very long at all and if you think I’m taking too long you can call me on Sam’s phone and I’ll rush right over. I’ll just be up there on that floor,” she said and pointed towards the twentieth floor. “Not far away at all.”

“And I can show you your mom’s old office.” Sam pointed higher. “She worked _all_ the way up there. Or we can just ride the elevator up and down. It goes pretty fast. If I didn’t have so much work to do all the time that’s what I would do all day, every day.”

Fi gave Sam a careful smile, looking back at Lena for a brief moment. “Can we do both?”

“It’s your mom’s company,” Sam said. “We can definitely do both.”

“Is that okay?” Fi asked, looking up at Lena.

“All systems go, my treasure. Just don’t let anyone step on your cape.”

“I won’t!” she cried, wrapping the cape around her defensively while she giggled.

 _I’d rather ride up and down the elevator with you and Sam,_ Lena thought. Of course, she would have rather done pretty much anything else than go talk to her mother.

As if Sam could read her mind she beckoned to the both of them. “We can ride up together,” she said, digging her keycard out of her pocket.

Walking into L-Corp had the quality of a dream, one that lost some of its etherealnesses holding Fi. The divide between her past and present became clearer and she could see both at once as if they existed side-by-side. Sitting around the table having breakfast with Fi and Kara had felt different, it had felt _real. It felt like home,_ Lena thought, knowing how crazy that might have sounded if she had voiced it out loud.

 _You need sleep,_ she told herself. _But right now you need to focus and you need to steel yourself because you’re walking into a cage match with the undisputed champion of all that’s horrible._ That thought jolted her awake better than a cup of coffee ever could and she held Fi a little tighter to her as they stepped onto the elevator and she punched the button for the twentieth floor.

The ride up was fast, faster than Lena remembered it ever being and when the doors opened she stuck her foot out to make sure the door wouldn’t shut before she let Fi hop down. “I promise I won’t be longer than twenty minutes. That’s about one chapter of Alice if I show you all the pictures,” she said, knowing that Fi would have a better grasp of time when explained in something so familiar to the both of them.

Fi nodded. “Do you think Supergirl can read me another chapter tonight after dinner?”

That lightened the mood considerably and Lena felt Sam’s eyes on her, inquisitive and wondering, not all that different from Fi’s most of the time. “I don’t want to go making promises for other people, love but I’m almost certain she will, and if she’s too busy, then I will. If that’s alright with you,” she said, kissing her forehead.

Fi gave her a thumbs up and kissed her on the cheek.

“I’ll be right back,” Lena promised. “Go have fun with Aunt Sam.” She gave Fi one final hug and set her down.

Sam offered Fi her hand which she took after a moment of contemplation, holding it tightly. “What did you dress up for on Halloween?” Fi asked Sam as Lena stepped out of the elevator.

“A very tired CEO,” Sam said, winking at Lena as she stepped out of the elevator. “I’m actually still wearing my costume,” she said as the doors closed.

The walk back down the hall towards Meeting Room B was familiar as was the sickening clench of her stomach when she caught sight of her mother waiting for her, head bowed slightly and her hands clasped in front of her. She looked up when Lena’s hand closed on the knob of the door and stood up when she entered.

“Do you have people following me, mother?”

“Hello to you too, Lena.” Her mother sat back down, her gaze not quite as steely as Lena remembered it being, lingering longer on her face than it ever had before. From a distance, she had looked exactly as Lena remembered her looking but up close, Lena could see the appearance of fine lines around her eyes and mouth. Thin creases that did not so much age her as complete the look of a woman that is not to be trifled with.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” she said and pulled out the seat directly opposite her mother and sat down. “How else would you know I would be here?” Her eyes narrowed, not under any illusion that anything she could do would actually cause her mother to feel anything resembling shame but she at least needed to try.

Lillian sighed, a sound that Lena had heard too many times to ever truly forget. How any person could pack so much disdain into one utterance was truly impressive and for one brief second, Lena had to fight very hard against the urge to laugh.”I called,” Lillian said, unclasping her hands. “Several times, actually. If you had bothered to answer your phone…”

Lena instinctively reached for her phone, surprised to see so many missed calls, very quickly turning the ringer back on.

“And you hung up on me last night,” she reminded her.

“You should be used to that by now, mother.” Lena’s expression remained stony but she gave a small almost imperceptible shake of her head. “I had an emergency to deal with last night.”

“So soon after getting back?” Lillian’s eyebrow arched upward at an impressive angle but she seemed disinterested in pursuing the topic any further, leaning back a bit in her chair. “I am _not_ having you followed, Lena. And if I was, I’m sure that you would have realized that by now.”

“That almost sounded like a compliment.” She reached for one of the bottles of water on the table that Sam had likely brought in when seeing Lillian into the meeting room. She unscrewed the cap and took a drink, mulling overseeing how long she could make the bottle last if she tried drinking it all in one go. It wouldn’t buy her all that much time but it would piss her mother off quite nicely, although she had never needed to ever try that hard to do that. 

She drummed her fingers on the bottle. “Enough niceties,” she muttered and looked up to meet her mother’s gaze. “Whatever reason you have for wanting to try and take L-Corp from Sam, whatever you’re scheming… It ends now. The company is in far better hands than it ever was in a Luthor’s. I won’t allow you to undo any of her hard work for what I can only imagine is a grudge. But whatever it is, I’m telling you to drop it. Walk away.”

Lillian opened her mouth and Lena was so sure that she would let out another one of her trademark sighs that she was all the more surprised at what came out of her mouth next.

“I don’t want L-Corp back, Lena.”

 _That_ caught her off guard and Lena knew at once that it showed on her face. “You’re lying,” she said, shaking her head. “Unless you’re just that bored and looking to cause trouble for Sam, and for me,” she added as an afterthought with none of the venom she meant to send it out with. Yes, the plane ride was an inconvenience, yes, she would have rather not have dragged Fi into a mess that she had washed her hands of _years_ ago but in a roundabout way, Lillian was responsible for her seeing Kara again. If not for her or Sam’s email, would she have come back, ever? It was a possibility, she supposed, but not a very likely one.

“Please, Lena,” she said and gave a very brief shake of her head. “If I wanted L-Corp back then I would have been much further along in the bid than firing off warning shots and overpaying my lawyers for a bit of paperwork.” She looked somewhat affronted and sat up straighter in her chair. “Just as I would never assume you lost your edge in the time you’ve been away, I can assure you that I haven’t lost mine.”

“Yes,” Lena agreed. “I would never accuse you of losing your edge, mother. You’re nothing _but_ sharp edges.”

Lillian chuckled. “Not untrue,” she said, her head tilted to one side, eyes still focused on Lena. She took a deep breath and let it out all at once like air from a rapidly deflating balloon. “Which is why I went to such lengths to get you here. You wouldn’t have come otherwise.”

Lena’s eyes narrowed. “So,” Lena said slowly, trying to figure out what angle her mother was working, examining it from all angles like an overly intricate puzzle box. “You made Sam’s life a living hell to get me to come back to the city… For what?”

“To apologize to you, Lena. To try and make amends…” She clamped her mouth shut but the slightly uneasy look on her face was easy enough to read. _If that’s possible_ , it said.

“Make amends?” Lena let out a bark of laughter. “You’re not in the market for a kidney, are you, mother?”

“No,” Lillian said plainly, her mouth turned upward into something resembling a grimace. “My mortality is not the impetus for this, Lena. I-” She gnawed on her bottom lip, showcasing that carefulness that Lena had learned early on after finding herself adopted by the Luthors. “I _like to think_ ,” she said carefully, qualifying her statement instead of simply stating it as fact, “that I’ve changed.”

_Did hell freeze over while I was away?_

“As unbelievable as you may find that,” Lillian said as if she could read Lena’s mind. “I have been trying to be better.” She gave a somewhat petulant looking shrug, rolling her shoulders. “If you need proof of that, you can ask Kara Danvers. I haven’t had any run-ins with her since you left National City.”

“Kind of a low bar. Not having Supergirl put you back in prison is not the accomplishment you seem to think it is.” She had every intention of checking the veracity of her claims with Kara later. Their all-night conversation hadn’t drifted onto the topic of Lillian but now she kind of wished that it had although Lena doubted if she was lying. It was too flimsy of a lie to serve any real benefit. If she had tangoed with Kara again during her time away she would have read about it. She would have watched it on the news. A Luthor and a Super going mano a mano was front page, we interrupt this program kind of news that you heard about whether you wanted to or not.

“Have you talked to her yet?” Lillian asked with a certain glibness as if her and Kara’s reunion was ineluctable.

_Maybe it was,_ a voice suggested.

“You have,” she said after studying Lena's face for a moment, not waiting for Lena to answer either way. “Have you forgiven one another?”

The question was one that should have been _dripping_ in venom, in that special kind of pity that Lena sometimes thought had been reserved wholly for her alone especially when it came to Supergirl but there was none which put her guard up even more. “That’s none of your business,” Lena said coldly.

“I suppose it’s not,” Lillian said agreeably.

“If you’ve been keeping tabs on me all this time, why not come to me? Why go to all this trouble?”

“You never even told me that you were leaving,” Lillian reminded her. “When I found out I tracked you down-”

“I was never _trying_ to hide,” Lena said hotly, hearing the steady beat of war drums in her ears that she associated with holidays at the Luthor household, that fury that threatened to burst out of her like an alien in a B-grade horror movie.

Lillian smiled. “I know that. If you didn’t want to be found… It would have been nearly impossible to find you. I just wanted to know where you were,” she admitted. “I knew why you left. The Kryptonian broke your-”

“You don’t know why I left,” Lena said, cutting her off, bitter cold seeping into her voice like frost creeping along a windowpane. “I didn’t leave because of a broken heart.” Her broken heart had been the driving force between a lot of bad decisions but her leaving National City wasn’t among them.

“Either way,” Lillian said, keeping her voice remarkably steady. “You had a falling out with _Supergirl_ and your other friends and I just assumed that you would come back someday. After you had cooled off after the timer on that stubbornness expired but you never did. You stayed away.”

 _Yes,_ Lena thought, _because that was best for everyone. Best for Kara and best for me._ She had truly believed that. It had been the one thing that had stopped her from returning some nights when the loneliness felt overwhelming when the days and especially the nights felt long and she missed Kara and missed the life she had left behind. Until Fi had come along she had thought that ache might never truly vanish.

“And the reason you didn’t come knocking on my door in Ireland to apologize? You either couldn’t be bothered or maybe you’ve just recently had an epiphany about wanting to reconcile? Not that there’s anything to reconcile in the first place.”

“Your daughter,” Lillian said and looked out the window of the meeting room like she expected to see her waiting just outside for Lena to step back out. “When I found out you had adopted, I was surprised, to say the least. I knew then that you likely didn’t have any plans of returning to National City and I thought about flying there…. Having the conversation that we’re having right now or at least _trying_ to have. But I reconsidered.”

“Not enough frequent flyer miles?”

“You wouldn’t have wanted to see me, and by that point, you had lived there for nearly seven years. I didn’t want my coming to see you be the thing that uprooted you.”

“You wouldn’t have scared me off, mother.” Lena drummed her fingers on the table and turned her wrist towards her to steal a glance at her watch. She had promised Fi she wouldn’t be long and she intended to keep it.

“Maybe not but if I showed up on your doorstep out of the blue Lena, I’m sure it would have crossed your mind to cover your tracks and find a new place to live if only to keep me away from your daughter…” She said this with the business-like efficiency that Lena was so used to hearing but there was something else hiding behind in its shadow. Something that to Lena’s ear sounded almost like guilt.

Lena unscrewed and screwed the cap of her water bottle off and on again “You’re not wrong,” she admitted. “The thought would have crossed my mind.” _Probably more than a thought,_ Lena mused. Keeping FI safe had been directive number one and two when she had decided to adopt Fi and if her mother had come sniffing around, she would have wanted to put some distance between her and Fi. _One or two oceans worth of distance..._

“Of course it would have,” Lillian said, her mouth curved into a smile of grim satisfaction.

“I’m here now. You did all of this because you wanted to apologize to me,” Lena said in a skeptical tone. “And after you do, you’ll stop going after L-corp, after Sam?”

“I told you that I have no interest in L-Corp, Lena.” She cast an eye around the room. “But I would like something in return for my agreement to step away from the table.”

“ _Of course,_ you do,” Lena said, who had been waiting for this other shoe to drop with all the force of a falling house into the Land of Oz. “And all for the low low price of what exactly?”

“Dinner.”

“Dinner?”

“With you,” Lillian clarified. “You and Fiona.”

“Out of the question,” Lena said and crossed her arms tightly around her, shaking her head adamantly. “If you think that I’ll let you blackmail me into letting you into her life then you don’t know me very well at all,” she said, already beginning to seethe. “But look who I’m talking to.”

“I said dinner, Lena,” Lillian said in an infuriatingly patient tone that Lena didn’t care for in the slightest. “That’s all. No more, no less. I have no expectations or demands after that.” She pushed her chair back from the table, signaling that she had laid all her cards down on the table.

“Most people don’t start off apologies by asking for favors.” Maybe she shouldn’t have been shocked that such a basic principle was lost on Lillian. Had she _ever_ apologized for anything? The halfhearted teeth clenched ones hardly counted. The ones that she had been happy to dole out when there was no other option available.

“You’ll get the apology, either way, Lena. But as far as L-Corp goes… Having dinner together are the terms. No negotiation on that front, I’m afraid.” She leaned over the table, looking at Lena stubbornly until their eyes met. “Do you think I like going to such lengths to arrange a simple dinner with my daughter?”

“Sam and I can beat you in court,” Lena said. She said this with the same slow patience that Lillian had shown her just moments ago. Scheming could only get one so far, especially since profits at L-Corp had never been better even with all the money being poured into more charitable ventures.

“I’m sure you can,” Lillian said, batting a hand out in front of her. “But that will take time and money. I’m sure you’ve already done the calculations.” She wrinkled her nose. “I’m not asking you to even meet me halfway here, Lena.” She let that truth hang in the air like a slow-moving blimp. “I’m sure you don’t want to hear it, Lena but I am sorry.”

Lena felt her bristling like a spooked cat. Her muscles tightened so completely and so quickly that she could have sworn she heard the cords in her neck tighten as she sat up straighter in her chair. “An apology won’t fix things,” Lena said plainly.

“I know… But regardless… I owe you one, I owe you several.” She cleared her throat. “I wasn’t the mother that you or Lex needed.” Her eyes misted over and she blinked twice and they were clear as a freshly washed windowpane.

 _How many itty bitty boxes do you have, mother?_ Lena pondered.

“If there was anything that I could do to take it back... “ She shook her head, the fine lines around her mouth deepening when she frowned. “If there’s anything I _can_ do, I would be more than happy to do it.”

“And if I ask you to leave L-Corp alone to not bother Sam ever again? That I want it in writing? Would you do that?” Lena flashed a very dry smile. Asking her mother for that felt to her like asking a genie for more wishes. There might be a degree of hesitation and her mother might even find such a request amusing but the rules were quite clear. _Crystal clear._ No wishing for more wishes and no giving something away for free.

“I knew you’d ask that.”A ghost of a smile touched her lips and Lillian reached for her purse and set it between them like a divider before she opened it and pulled a number of documents held together with a paperclip. “I’ve already signed them,'' she said, watching Lena begin to flip through them.

“This is a-”

“Share transfer agreement,” Lillian finished, pushing a pen over to Lena’s side of the table. “It seemed the most expedient solution. Anything else and I could have gotten the contract thrown out in court, this is infinitely more cut and dry.”

The contract itself was fairly boilerplate, one that Lena had no trouble skimming even with so little gas left in her tank. “You want to give me half of your remaining shares in L-Corp?” She looked at her mother over top of the documents looking for any sign of a tell, already knowing that she didn’t have one.

“That would leave me with about a five percent share in the company. I could get every single board member to go along with a hostile takeover and I still wouldn’t have enough power to follow through with it. I told you that I had no interest in L-Corp, Lena. And if this is what you want,” she said and pulled a pen from her purse, holding it out to her. “If this is all I can do for you then sign and you never have to see me again.”

Lena began to look over the contract in more detail, looking for any sign of tampering or hidden fine print that might come back to bite her in the ass later. When she found none she began the somewhat tedious task of initialing and signing everywhere she needed to, flipping back and forth to make sure she hadn’t missed anything, feeling Lillian’s gaze on her as she did so.

Lena paused, the pen just a centimeter or so away from the paper when she looked up. “You could apologize a million times and it wouldn’t be enough,” she said.

“I know that.” 

“And whether genuine or not, one act of contrition won’t be enough to make me trust you again.” Lena doubted such a thing was even possible. ‘Impossible’ was not a word that Lena had ever taken much stock in but it seemed appropriate now. “I’m still not convinced this isn’t some elaborate plan to…” She shook her head looking more tired than angry. “To do something horrible.”

Lena signed her name on the last page with a particularly savage flourish and let out a breath that she had just realized she had been holding. “I have told Fi about you. She knows she has a grandmother…”  
  
“How magnanimous of you.”

“So glad you think so…” She capped the pen and held it out to her mother as some kind of quasi-olive branch. “If Fi wants to meet you then we can have dinner together. But if you say anything, do anything to hurt her, dinner will be over and I’ll make you regret ever luring me back here.”

“Of course you will,” Lillian said.  
  
“And you’ll apologize to Sam.”   
  
“Oh, Lena. It’s just business. If she can’t handle a little stress-”   
  
“An apology letter will suffice. I’m certain she would prefer it to another face-to-face meeting and I’ll be in touch soon.”   
  
“I hope so. I’ll leave my ringer on,” she said as Lena strode past her, the corners of her mouth turned ever so slightly upward.

* * *

"How did it go?"

Sam had been pushing Fi around in her office chair and had brought her to a spinning stop in front of Lena when Lena had stepped into her office.

“Not bad,” Lena said quickly and in a somewhat hushed whisper. She bent down close to Fi and returned the jubilant smile on her face with one of her own. "Someone's been having fun."

"We have," Fi said, looking up at Sam and kicking her legs a little to make the chair rattle a bit closer to Lena. "I missed you though."

"And I missed you," Lena said, planting twin kisses on both of Fi's cheeks. She handed the folded up contract to Sam and couldn't stop herself from grinning despite still trying to process everything that had happened with her mother. "Say thank you, Lena.”

Sam's eyes scanned from left to right, flipping through the contract, skimming it, her brain likely making the necessary leaps in logic and ran a hand through her hair, mussing it before she smoothed it flat again. "You have to be sh-" She coughed loudly, glancing over guiltily at Fi. "sleepy," she said, pointing at Lena and mimed wiping a bead of sweat from her forehead when Fi hopped off the chair and began running around the office, her cape flapping out behind her, none the wiser.   
  
“So that’s it?” Sam looked just as skeptical as Lena felt.

"I can give you the abridged version now and the longer version tomorrow? I really am tired."

"Give it to me on the way back to the hotel," Sam said. "I'm driving. Least I can do," she said, making exaggerated moon eyes at Lena. "If you wait and let me tell the lawyers they'll want to carry you out on their shoulders or dump a cooler of Gatorade over your head, I'm not sure which.”  
  
"I think I'd prefer the nap," Lena said, scooping Fi up as she made another pass near them with her arms stretched out in front of her.  
  
"I should get that engraved on my coffee mug," Sam said, jangling her car keys and gesturing towards the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks as always for reading! Cut this chapter a little shorter which means the next will be a bit longer.  
> I hope that everyone is staying safe and isn't stressing too much. Wherever you are in the world I hope you're doing well.  
> If you want to ask me anything, request prompts or need to vent: inkedroplets.tumblr.com/


	4. Walking on a String

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _I think about you walking on a string  
>  And it always brings me back here  
> Into the garden by the hand  
> Anyone who knows what love is will understand  
> You've always had me walking on a string_
> 
> -Matt Berninger feat. Phoebe Bridgers 'Walking On A String'

Lena had been able to give Sam a very truncated version of events while remaining mindful about what Fi might overhear in the backseat. Lena knew that no matter how engrossed Fi was with the video she was watching on Lena’s phone she would absorb at least some of what Lena was saying and saved some of the more salient points of their meeting for later, like how her mother seemed to have had a complete personality transplant since her time away.    
  
Once back at the hotel, Sam had walked with Lena and Fi to the elevator, switching her phone to vibrate when it continued to chirp incessantly at more frequent intervals the more she ignored it. There were lots of things that Lena missed about her work at L-Corp but the seemingly never-ending barrage of phone calls and texts from business associates was not among them.   
  
“I know you have plans tonight,” Sam said, looking at Lena sideways. “But I would like to catch up, see the munchkin again before you leave. Somehow a yearly email is not enough time to keep abreast of everything going on in each other’s lives.” 

“No,” Lena said, trying and failing to ignore the little stab of guilt when she thought of how she had kept Sam at arm’s length all these years. “Not nearly enough. I really did miss you, Sam.”    


“Naturally.” Her lips curved upward into a smile as the elevator doors dinged open. “We have lots to catch up on, especially in light of recent events,” she said slyly.   
  
“You mean my mother seemingly finding a heart out of the blue?” Lena whispered, ignoring how hot her cheeks felt as she ushered Fi into the elevator, trying not to overthink that evening’s plans with Kara.

“You know I don’t,” Sam teased as the elevator doors began to close. “It was good seeing you both.” She held a hand up to her ear in a ‘call me’ gesture and waved enthusiastically to Fi who slipped behind Lena poking her head out from behind her but waving just as enthusiastically back. 

Against all odds, Lena had been able to coax Fi into a short nap and while Lena would have liked to sleep longer it would be enough to see her through the evening and not wreak any more havoc on her sleep schedule.    
  
They ate lunch in their room watching one of the DVD’s that Lena had packed, Fi tossing out questions that as always never seemed to follow a straight line leapfrogging from one topic to the next with seemingly no rhyme or reason with Lena happy to answer each one to the best of her ability. A day would come when Lena wouldn’t have an answer for her, but so far, at least, she was batting a thousand.    
  
When six o’clock rolled around, Lena wasn’t sure whether to expect Kara at the balcony or the door. She divided her attention between them evenly while Fi had put all her money on the balcony, sitting right next to it with a book open in her lap, not really reading it but ruffling the pages ever so often.    
  
“You’ll give yourself a paper cut if you’re not careful,” Lena warned. She too looked out the balcony window to the portrait-sized view of the city. She stood up off the sofa meaning to join Fi but froze halfway up when there was a sharp rap of knuckles on their door. 

Fi stood up like a shot, looking back towards the balcony. "I thought that she would fly here," she said, sounding a little disappointed. Not that it stopped her from making a beeline to the door. Used to these bursts of speed that Lena couldn’t help but envy, she caught Fi around the middle just before she had time to throw open the door and lifted her up. 

Blinking innocently, Fi looked almost surprised to see Lena. “I think it’s Supergirl,” she said as if she alone was privy to that information.   
  
Lena nodded. “It  _ might  _ be, but before we open the door we need to make sure because-”   
  
“Because we don’t open the door for strangers,” Fi answered without a whiff of sarcasm that might accompany such a statement if Lena were to ask her the same question in a few years.    


“That’s right,” Lena said and held Fi close enough so that she could peer through the peephole. “Is it Supergirl?”   
  
Fi gazed through the peephole, closing her other eye like she was peering through a telescope as she did, and fell silent for a moment before turning her head back towards Lena. “I think it’s Kara,” she said and gave a quick shake of her head to show that she wasn’t completely sure either way.    
  
“Kara?” Lena’s eyes widened. She too gazed through the peephole and saw Kara waving to her warmly. She wasn’t surprised to see that it was Kara that had come knocking but she was surprised to see that she had come wearing her glasses instead of her cape…    
  
“Mom?”

Lena’s gaze shifted briefly back to Fi. She flashed her a very brief very luminous grin and fumbled briefly with the lock before opening the door and taking a step back to let Kara inside. She was wearing a comfortable-looking pair of high waisted jeans and an ivory-colored sweater   
  
“Kara…” Their eyes met and Lena’s gaze flickered away for one brief instant before it returned the two of them exchanging identical smiles as she set Fi back down who was looking at Kara quizzically. “I… I wasn’t expecting you.”   
  
You weren’t?” Catching up just a beat later, she nodded very briskly and pushed her glasses up a little higher on her nose. “You weren’t. I ran into Supergirl today after she helped put out that fire downtown and she told me that you were visiting and I  _ really  _ wanted to see you. Both of-   
  
“Fi!”   


Lena watched as Fi took one of her patented running leaps, arm outstretched towards Kara, her expression serene, one of a trapeze artist who trusted their partner implicitly. Kara caught her easily, lifting her high and bringing her down rocking her from side to side like she was slowly floating back down to the ground which  _ delighted  _ Fi.   
  
The death-defying leap was nothing new but Fi was  _ always  _ shy around strangers. It had taken running into Fi and her mother in the bookstore a number of times before she had stopped peering out from behind her mother to wave shyly at Lena when they ran into one another.    
  
“How’s that for a hello,” Lena said reproachfully, letting out a comically loud exhale through her nose. “You’re just lucky that Kara caught you.” She gave Fi’s cape a little ruffle with her hand. “That cape doesn’t mean you can fly,” she reminded her.   
  
Fi nodded dutifully and turned her attention to Kara. “Where’s your cape?”

“My cape?” Kara’s eyebrows shot upward and she fiddled with her glasses, looking to Lena as if she were shrinking into herself in a bid to make herself look smaller. 

Fi nodded. “Do you have it on under your sweater?” She craned her neck trying to get a better look, eyes shining brightly before turning her attention back to Lena. “Can I wear  _ my  _ cape under my shirt or my pajamas?” She plucked at her shirt, eyes alight with possibility. 

Lena exchanged another brief but meaningful look with Kara, communicating without speaking, too rudimentary to be called telepathy but something in the ballpark at least.   
  
“Fi..." Lena said gently, not quite sure what to say. “This is  _ Kara _ . You know who she is. You’ve seen lots of pictures…”   
  
“You have lots of pictures of me?” Kara looked pleased, fiddling with her glasses again.    
  
Lena blushed, a little too distracted to feel too embarrassed about that revelation. There had been a time that her home in Ireland hadn’t had a single photograph or memento from her time in National City. It had been too painful a thing being reminded of what she had left behind until one day it had become too painful not to have them there.   


Fi studied Kara’s face, looking momentarily unsure like she had suddenly found herself on shaky ground before her smile returned and she leaned back precariously closer to Lena. She whispered in that voice of hers that was the farthest thing from a whisper: “I  _ know  _ she’s Supergirl,” she said in a tone that might have had the faintest hint of pity that Lena might not have caught on.  


“I was waiting for you over there,” Fi said and pointed to the spot on the floor next to the balcony she had recently vacated. “I thought that you would fly in through the balcony,” Fi said, sounding almost disappointed that she hadn’t.    
  
Kara’s gaze settled on Lena, exchanging another look, this one closer to telepathy because Lena could almost hear Kara’s voice in her head:  _ Is it okay?  _ Lena glanced nervously at Fi and saw how at home she seemed in Kara’s arms, how safely that Kara was holding her, and responded to Kara’s question with a small smile.

“I can fly in through the balcony next time,” Kara offered. “Just as long as you promise that you’ll let me in.” She pretended to pound on an invisible door with her free hand which made Fi giggle.   
  
“Supergirl foiled by a locked door,” Lena teased, the carefree expression on her face morphing into one of puzzlement. “Fi?”   
  
“What?”   
  
“How did you know that Kara was Supergirl?”    
  
Fi stared back at her, looking equally as puzzled. She studied Kara’s face for a moment and turned back to face Lena. “I just knew. Why?”   
  
“You just amaze me is all,” Lena said, voice dripping with affection.    
  
“You amaze me,” Fi said, returning Lena’s compliment with gusto.    
  
“Such a sweet thing to say and so far from bedtime at that,” Lena teased, eyes twinkling. “But before we have dinner, we need to talk about something.” She dropped to one knee so that she and Fi were face to face knowing that there would come a time that she wouldn’t need to stoop 

“What about?”   
  
“Well,” Lena said, wishing that the numerous parenting books she had read over the years had included a chapter about secret identities. “About Kara and about Supergirl.” She looked up at Kara, giving her the green light to jump in any time, feeling somehow lighter knowing that this particular teachable moment wasn’t one she wouldn’t be facing alone.   
  
“There’s a reason that Supergirl keeps her name a secret,” Lena said, not for the first time since diving headfirst into motherhood like she was edging out onto a tree branch unsure if it would bear up under her weight.   
  
“Because of the bad guys?”   
  
Lena smiled. Luckily for her, this matter was much more black and white than some of the other things the two would need to discuss one day. So often things were shades of varying grey rather than just black and white and who knew that better than herself? “Because of the bad guys. And not just because it could be dangerous for Kara but to keep the people she cares about safe.”   
  
“Like you and your mom,” Kara said. She joined Lena on the floor choosing to sit instead of kneeling. She lifted Fi into her lap. “I know that it’s a big secret to keep,” Kara said and she glanced at Lena when she said this, a silhouette of guilt crossed her face and she reached a hand out that Lena took almost at once, her heart picking up speed like a locomotive.    
  
“It’s a good secret,” Lena assured her. She wanted to make that abundantly clear. “Aunt Sam knows too… So it’s one that we can share with the people that Kara cares about the most.”   
  
“I can keep it,” Fi said. She looked from Kara and back to Lena. Her face was all business and with her raven hair tied back in a ponytail, Lena could see herself in her. She wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or not.    
  
Lena smiled warmly. She was certain that Fi could keep the secret. If she hadn’t been Lena would have made a go of convincing her that Kara was Kara and Supergirl was Supergirl but even if she had, Lena wasn’t so sure that it would have done any good. Bells couldn’t be unrung, after all. “I know you can, my treasure.”

  
“And so do I.” Kara grinned and floated up off the ground keeping a tight hold on Fi as they rose high enough for Kara's head to brush the ceiling and touch down on the floor again.    
  
“Mom! Did you see us? We flew!”   
  
“I saw.” She stood up and stroked Fi’s hair, then the side of her face. She did the same thing sometimes when she slipped into her room at night to check in on her before turning in herself. Almost as if she needed to be sure she was still there.    
  
Kara’s stomach gave a comically loud rumble that seemed to surprise even her. She grinned sheepishly and toyed with her glasses a bit. “Do they have Big Belly Burger in Ireland?” she asked, looking around at both Lena and Fi.   
  


* * *

  
  
Ireland  _ didn’t  _ have a Big Belly Burger. The powers that be hadn’t expanded out that way. There was, of course, no shortage of fast food places even in the small town that she had put down roots but in Lena’s humble opinion there was nothing that could compare to Big Belly Burger. 

  
Settled down on hard plastic seats at a table in the corner, the three of them ate their way through two trays piled high with burgers and fries while they talked until all that remained was a few blots of ketchup and a crumpled pile of burger wrappers.   
  
Full and feeling more than a little drowsy, Lena took a sip of her cola, banking on the brevity of the sugar rush to see her out the other side of her approaching food coma. She gave the haphazard pile of wrappers a little jab with her finger as she counted and tilted her head mischievously. “Thank God that the hotel has a gym. My metabolism isn’t what it used to be.” She sighed dramatically, one eyebrow arched playfully. Maybe in a few more years when her youth was more firmly behind her, she might find it hard to joke about such things but for now, she had no trouble at all.    
  
“You probably still eat too much kale,” Kara said, scrunching her nose as Fi nodded vehemently, still pushing the toy car that had come in her kids' meal across the table. 

“And you don’t eat enough,” Lena countered.   
  
“I had a kale salad just the other day. Honest!” she said when Lena looked at her skeptically. “If you make me fly home and dig the receipt out of the garbage...” she mumbled, grinning to herself.    
  
“Kara Danvers willingly choosing to eat kale? I’m just going to assume that pigs learned to fly while I was in National City while I was away.”    
  
Kara went slightly pink and she crumpled up the burger wrapper in front of her into an impossibly small ball, placing it daintily on top of the pile, her gaze settling somewhere over Lena’s right shoulder. “It reminds me of you…”    
  
It was Lena’s turn to blush, thankful that Kara’s gaze was still fixed somewhere over her shoulder but waited until their eyes met before she spoke. After a decade apart, Lena had no desire to leave things unsaid and she was certain that Kara felt the same. “It’s just too bad that you’ll never get a chance to miss me that much again… It’s going to be impossible to get you to eat vegetables otherwise,” she teased.    
  
“You don’t eat vegetables?” Fi asked. Lena could almost hear the gears turning in her head and Lena could already hear the defense that Fi would mount the next time she set down a plate in front of her with too much green on it:  _ Supergirl doesn’t eat vegetables! _   
  
“I eat vegetables! It’s just your mom eats too many and it makes me look bad. And she’s usually so sweet.” Kara put a hand over her heart, eyes closed for a moment before she opened them again, hand reaching for her oversized drink. “I completely forgot! How did your meeting at L-Corp go? Good news, I hope.”   
  
She wouldn’t have gone as far as to call it good news but she also couldn’t classify it as bad either. A first for when it came to her mother. Lena stole a glance over at Fi who was steering the toy car along with the table's edge, deftly avoiding what looked like a ketchup stain that might have been there since Lena had last been in National City. “The meeting went well… I think. Lillian signed over the majority of her shares to me. Without that… She can make a lot of noise but it would be impossible to do anything more than that.’   
  
“That fast?” Kara’s face fell and it looked like she realized it a second too late because she overcorrected and smiled toothily. “I figured that you would be here for a while cleaning up that mess…”   
  
_ Me too…  _ _   
_ _   
_ “But that’s great… For Sam, and for the company. And you,” Kara added, looking somewhat guilty.   
  
“I don’t know about great,” Lena said, shaking her cup and rattling the ice that remained inside like a maraca. “You didn’t have any run-ins with her at all while I was gone, did you?”    
  
“No.” Kara took a long sip of her drink, draining half of it in one giant gulp. “She’s been off the DEO’s radar for a while now too. She’s been, as far as I can tell, a model citizen.”   
  
“Next time you do a patrol you might want to look for those flying pigs,” Lena said. Kara’s testimony was another point in her mother’s favor but it was not nearly enough to absolve her completely of all suspicion. Her mother had no goodwill to draw on and years worth of duplicitous behavior that made Lena doubt if taking the olive branch that she had extended to her was wise, especially with Fi in the picture.    
  
“She wants to have dinner together,” Lena said, tracing a finger along the rim of her cup, grinning when she saw the gobsmacked expression on Kara’s face.   
  
“Who wants to have dinner together?” Fi asked, leaping back into the conversation.   
  
Not for the first time did the idea of simply lying to her mother about Fi not wanting to have dinner with her leaped into her mind. It was by far the most expedient solution. Sam had what she needed and while her mother would definitely know that she was lying, what did that matter, really?. She would have (for the first time in her life) the moral high ground on Lena which while irksome didn’t mean anything to Lena especially when it meant keeping Fi far from her mother’s orbit. But if she truly just wanted dinner together, no strings and no hidden machinations…

“Your grandmother... While we’re visiting, she thought it would be nice if we have dinner together. If you wanted to, of course, Fi.” Lena tried her best to keep her tone at the very least, neutral, not quite able to find it within herself to sound  _ excited  _ about the prospect of dinner with her mother but maybe if she had more time….  _ Or alcohol,  _ she thought.  _ That would help tremendously.  _   
  
“My Grandma?” Fi asked, her eyes wide as she let the toy car go. It bounced off one of the plastic trays on the table and careened off the edge of the table. Before it hit the ground, Kara reached out a hand, caught it, and slid it back onto the table, not taking her eyes off Lena the entire time.    
  
Lena nodded. “My mot- My mom,” she said, earning an inquiring look from Fi that passed as quickly and easily as a summer storm. “She wants to meet you.”  _ I just wish I knew that was all she wanted…  _   
  
“Meet me?” Fi asked, sounding sincerely surprised, eyes wide and doelike.    
  
“Meet you, yes,” Lena said, chuckling. “Who wouldn’t want to meet you, my treasure?”    
  
“I want to too. I want to meet grandma.”    
  
_ That might be the first time that anyone’s ever been excited to see you, mother…  _

“Can Kara come too?” Fi asked, tugging on Kara’s arm as polite as can be.    
  
Lena couldn’t think of any person that her mother would have less liked to share a meal with except for maybe Kara’s cousin. It was something so unlikely that Lena had trouble even imagining what that might look like. In her mind’s eye, she saw her mother and Kara sitting on opposite ends of that impossibly long dining table that you almost needed to shout across in order to be heard. She could hear the clatter of silverware and feel the uncomfortable silence that rolled in like a thick morning fog. The image became so vivid that Lena gave her head a little shake and looked up at Kara.    
  
“Well…” Kara said diplomatically, not floundering exactly but to Lena’s trained eye it looked like she would get there sooner rather than later. “I think that-”   
  
“Would be a lovely idea,” Lena finished for her. “If you’re not busy... “ She leaned closer to Kara, pretending to try and get a better look at the menu so she could whisper to Kara without Fi realizing. “If you don’t want to go,” she hissed. “You don’t have to.”   
  
“I am  _ never  _ too busy for you or your mom,” Kara said. “But are you sure that it’s okay? If it’s just family I wouldn’t want to intrude…”   
  
“You can’t do that if you’re invited,” Lena reminded her. “Right, Fi?”   
  
“Right!” Fi chirped, bouncing a little in her seat, reaching for the toy car and pushing it along the edge of the table. “So you’ll come?”    
  
Kara nodded, looking around at both of them. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”   
  


* * *

  
  
The night air was just beginning to bite when the three of them arrived back in the hotel room and Lena took a moment to rub her hands together to force some warmth back into them. “The winters in Ireland are a lot milder,” Lena explained. “My body’s not used to the cold.”   
  
“Maybe  _ you  _ should start wearing a cape,” Kara teased and sped over to the couch, grabbed a blanket, and returned to Lena’s side in the blink of an eye. She wrapped the blanket around Lena’s shoulders before she had time to protest.    
  
Blushing, Lena drew the blanket tighter around her. “I’ll take it under advisement.”   
  
“That means that she’s thinking about it,” Fi said helpfully to Kara. She had heard Lena use that same turn of phrase many times before and had already asked what it had meant.   
  
“While I think about it. How about getting washed up and into your pajamas?”    
  
“I can do that,” Fi said, already making a beeline for the bathroom, cape rippling out behind her.    
  
“Cape off!” Lena called after her, fishing her cellphone from her pocket. “Could you go help her with that? I should call my mother before it's too late. Let her know that Fi agreed to meet her and to set an extra place at the table,” she teased.

“You gave me the easy job.” Kara laid a hand on Lena’s shoulder, squeezed gently, and floated past her towards the bathroom, sparing a glance back, flashing her a thumbs up.   


“Still welcome to trade,” Lena muttered, grinning to herself when she heard Kara let out a guffaw of laughter from the other room.

"No way!"  
  
Lena had expected (or maybe hoped) that the phone would ring long enough for her to prepare herself for the call but her mother picked up right after the second ring.    
  
_ “Hello, Lena.”  _ _   
_ _   
_ “I told you that I would be in touch,” Lena said, as always, feeling as if she needed to be on the defensive from the get-go when it came to her family, not that there was much of it left. She and her mother were all that was left of the Luthor name. 

_ “Yes, I still remember this afternoon vividly enough. I’m not quite that old yet, Lena.”  _   


“If you’re free tomorrow-”   
  
_ “I am,”  _ Lillian answered without waiting for Lena to finish.  _ “It would be much harder to find a day I was busy.” _ _   
_ _   
_ “No book club?” Lena snarked, unable to help herself.    
  
_ “No. I’m not that lonely,”  _ Lillian said, sounding mortified as if joining a book club was the one line she would not under any circumstances cross no matter how lonely she might have been.   
  
“Then we can have dinner tomorrow,” Lena said. She turned towards the bathroom at the sound of laughter and splashing from inside and the corners of her mouth tipped upward. “Fi wants to meet you too.”   


There was a momentary silence on the other end before Lillian spoke again.  _ “I’m glad to hear that.”  _   
  
_ Let's hope you stay glad,  _ Lena hoped. “And Kara will be coming too,” she said, refusing to tiptoe around the subject.   


More silence. “ _ As a guest, I hope and not a bodyguard. I understand your trepidation, Lena, but I can assure you that it’s just dinner.” _ _   
_ _   
_ “As a guest,” Lena said, a faint note of amusement in her voice. “You don’t mind?”   
  
_ “No, Lena, I don’t mind. Were you maybe hoping I might?” _   
  
“Maybe a little bit,” Lena admitted. “Tomorrow then?”    
  
“ _ Yes, tomorrow. Five o’clock. I’ll text you the address. It’s not all that far from where your old apartment was… It shouldn’t be that hard for you to find.” _ _   
_ _   
_ “I’ll manage, I’m sure.”   
  
“ _ Is Fiona allergic to anything? Anything she doesn’t like?” _ _   
_ _   
_ Lena blinked, surprised at the foresight. Was this really the same woman who had on some days forgotten (or pretended) that she didn’t even exist when they had been living under the same roof? The same woman who had shipped her off to boarding school without so much as a goodbye and had never once seemed at all interested in getting to know Lena?    
  
“ _ Lena?”  _ _   
_ _   
_ “No allergies to worry about. She doesn’t like edamame or kale all that much but she will eat it without too much fussing.”  _ Kara complains more than her…  _ “You’re not cooking, are you?” She found the idea of her mother turning over a new life unbelievable enough but trying to imagine her in the kitchen with an apron tied around her waist baking cookies was even harder.    
  
_ “I would hate to ruin the surprise,”  _ Lillian said, her voice lathered with sarcasm.  _ “Thank you, Lena… I thought when you called….”  _   
  
“I would cut and run? Even I’m not that cruel, mother.”   
  
_ “No, you’re not, but I wouldn’t have blamed you if you did. I’ll see you and Fiona and Kara, tomorrow…”  _   
  
“Tomorrow,” Lena said. She resisted the urge to pinch herself to make sure that this wasn’t some very elaborate dream.    
  
“ _ Does Kara have anything she can’t eat?”  _

Lena stifled a chuckle with the back of her hand. “She’s pickier than Fi…”   
  
“I am not!” Kara yelled, her voice floating out from the bathroom.    
  
“ _ Is that her?”  _   
  
Lena blushed. “It is.” She cleared her throat, shifting her phone from one ear to the other. “She  _ loves  _ potstickers. But that might be a bit too difficult…”   
  
_ “I’ll keep that in mind. Have a good night, Lena.” _ _   
_ _   
_ “Good night, mother.”

Lena lingered on the phone a few moments after the call disconnected before setting it down on the coffee table in front of her.   
  
"How did it go?" Kara had poked her head out from the bedroom. She had her hair up in a messy bun and she had taken off her glasses.   
  
"Good? I think? Honestly, I'm kind of waiting for the other shoe to drop."   
  
Kara chuckled. "And if there is no other shoe this time?" she asked.  
  
Lena blinked. "I don't know. I guess that means I'll have to call home every now and then and visit on her birthday." It sounded to Lena _too_ normal when her entire life had been anything but. "Either way.... Agreeing to have dinner with Lillian Luthor, you have to like Fi an awful lot to agree to that," she said, only half-joking.  
  
Kara nodded, hands up in mock surrender. "What gave me away?" She took a few steps closer to Lena, closing the distance between them.   
  
"I told you, weaponized cuteness." Lena pretended to furrow her brow and let out a little gasp of surprise when Kara pulled her into a hug, her head coming to rest against Kara's shoulder.   
  
"I still can't believe you're here," Kara whispered. "Can't believe that I get to hug you again..."   
  
"Want me to pinch you?" Lena asked breathlessly. She could hear her heart pounding, almost feel it thudding away, and tried not to think about how Kara could most definitely hear it as well, might even feel it with how tight their embrace was.  
  
"I want you to stay," Kara whispered in her ear, sending bolts of electricity arcing down Lena's back. "I know it wouldn't be easy... And I don't want to uproot Fi... But promise me that you'll think about it." Kara jerked her thumb back behind her towards the bedroom and cleared her throat. "Fi's waiting for a bedtime story and I think she prefers the way you read for Alice." She sniffed, pretending to look hurt. "We can take turns if you don't mind sharing the spotlight..."  
  
"With you? In a heartbeat. Maybe we could have some coffee afterward?"  
  
"It's a date," Kara said and pointed back towards the couch, taking a few steps toward the bedroom. "If you don't mind sharing your pajamas, that is."  
  
"Share?" Lena cocked an eyebrow upward, still blushing. "Those are definitely yours now, you probably stretched them all out," she teased. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed the chapter! 
> 
> Sorry for the delay. This month has been busy and I've barely had time to write but the next chapter will be out within the week. There will be a little jump to Christmas and I need to get that out before then. Hope that everyone is doing well and staying safe! Thanks so much for reading!  
> [Tumblr](https://inkedroplets.tumblr.com/)


	5. Am I Too Late?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _And now I tell you openly  
>  You have my heart so don't hurt me  
> You're what I couldn't find_
> 
> _A totally amazing mind  
>  So understanding and so kind  
> You're everything to me_  
> -The Cranberries 'Dreams'

Stepping out of Alex and Kelly’s bathroom for the third time that afternoon, this time wearing a blue dress, Kara did a half-hearted turn and immediately looked to Alex to gauge her first impression. “Is it better than the green one, at least?” She pointed to the small pile of clothes in the middle of the living room, outfits that she had already tried on and ruled out.    
  
“It’s definitely better,” Alex said, looking at Kara with the careful eye of an art critic, getting up from her spot on the couch and stepping closer. “But that's just because you look better in blue." 

"It's not too much?"

"It  _ might  _ be," Alex said cagily and sighed loudly when Kara disappeared back into the bathroom before she could stop her. "If it was dinner with anyone else," she called through the door, not bothering to raise her voice, sure that Kara could hear her just fine. "I’d say you were overdressed but you're having dinner with—

"Lena, I know," Kara said and stepped out once again, this time wearing a floral print dress, face already downcast. "Which is why I brought half of my closet over here… Maybe I should fly back…"

"I was more talking about you having dinner with Lillian Luthor," Alex said and flashed Kara a grin before her lips thinned, suddenly looking pensive. “Are you  _ sure  _ that Lillian just wants to have dinner, Kara?”   
  
“I am. Lena has her doubts, obviously, but even she admitted that Lillian seemed sincere.”   
  
“Well, faking sincerity is not exactly out of Lillian’s wheelhouse,” Alex said with a shrug and ran a hand through her hair.   
  
“Maybe not,” Kara admitted, “but in all that time that the DEO kept tabs on her, Lillian never got so much as a parking ticket. I don’t know, Alex. After all that time apart, all that time alone, I’d put more money on her wanting to reconnect with Lena than try and get revenge on her.”    
  
“You might have a point,” Alex said after a long stretch of silence. “Just promise that you’ll keep your guard at least partway up while you’re there.” She brushed some hair from her face and managed the easygoing smile that Kara was so fond of. “But, I did want to circle back around to Lena,” she said and pointed to the couch before walking over to it and flopping down on it, patting the cushion next to her. 

Kara glanced over at the remaining outfits that she had yet to try on but shuffled over to the couch and sat down beside Alex. “What about her?”   
  
“Where to start,” Alex said, a bemused smile spreading across her face. “How about with the fact that Lena’s been back in town a few days and you decided to keep that to yourself. Until this morning, when you burst in, nearly knocking Kelly over on her way out the door, carrying an armful of clothes and yelling about having to pick what to wear to dinner with Lena and her mother. And  _ her daughter _ .”    


“I only have half an hour,” Kara said apologetically. She checked her watch needlessly and checked it again right after as if worried that the minute hand might suddenly lurch forward and make her late for dinner. “I don’t want to be late for—”   
  
“Your date,” Alex finished for her and stood up off the couch. “You can give me the bullet points now and fill in all the blanks tomorrow if you have the time. But while you do, let’s make sure you know what you’re wearing before you go.” She reached down into the pile of clothes that Kara had yet to try on and pulled out a teal turtleneck sweater. “Go try this one on and then tell me again how you ran into Lena.”   
  


* * *

  
Piled into a cab with Kara on one side and Fi on the other, Lena felt the skeptical part of her brain offer up one final argument in favor of canceling dinner. After growing up in the same house as Lillian, she had more than enough material to form a very compelling argument. There were years and years of awful holidays and dinners within the manor to draw from, experiences and memories that she still could recall with alarming clarity. But as the cab rolled one street closer to Lillian’s apartment with evening traffic slowing them to almost a crawl, Lena found herself surprisingly calm.   
  
It might have had something to do with Kara who was sitting on her left and cradling Lena’s hand gently in her lap, looking out the window the way a first-time tourist might, or it could have been Fi who was sitting on her other side with a book open on her lap, lost in her own little world and the knowledge that Lena would do anything she needed to protect her. Or maybe, just maybe it was the cautious inkling of hope that her mother really was sincere this time, that this wasn’t another manipulation, one last chance to get a swipe in at Lena before Lena went somewhere out of her reach…   
  
“We’re here,” Kara said softly, giving Lena’s hand a gentle squeeze as the cab came to a stop in front of a high-rise apartment that looked remarkably similar to the building of Lena's old penthouse.   
“Last chance for the three of us to make a run for it,” Lena whispered, leaning just close enough to Kara so that Fi wouldn’t overhear, only mostly joking.    
  
“Just say the word,” Kara whispered back, unbuckling her seatbelt and stepping out of the car. “But,” she said and stuck her head back inside the car, “I  _ am  _ starving so…”

“I am too!” Fi said and gave Lena’s arm a gentle tug   
  
“Are you? Must have been all that flying you did today,” Lena said and gave Fi’s cape a flutter that she had on over her blouse. She lifted FI carefully out of her seat and clambered carefully out of the cab, wrapping Fi’s cape around her so that it didn’t get caught in the door.    
  
“No!” Fi said laughing, hiding her face in the crook of Lena’s shoulder. “That’s not why!”    
  
“No?” Lena asked, feigning shock. “I guess you wore the cape in case of an emergency then?”    
  
Fi nodded gravely. “An emergency,” she agreed and exchanged a smile with Kara.    
  
“Thinking ahead,” Lena said, nodding approvingly. “I doubt that there will be an emergency at dinner, although,” she said and leaned close to Fi’s ear to whisper conspiratorially. “Kara has been known to eat too much, we might need to roll her home.”    
  
“My place is a  _ long  _ way from this part of the city,” Kara said and pointed with an exaggerated motion to highlight just how far away it really was. “I think it would be too far for you to roll me anywhere, so I’ll try not to eat too much.” She traced a cross over her heart and smiled.    
  
“You can stay with us,” Fi suggested, looking at Kara over Lena’s shoulder. “Then you can  _ both  _ read me a story tonight.”    
  
“You are just a font of good ideas, aren’t you, my treasure?” Lena tousled Fi’s hair and glanced over at Kara apologetically. “But Kara might be—”   
  
“Just waiting for a proper invitation,” Kara finished. She took the stairs leading up to the apartment two at a time and paused with her hand near the intercom. “Maybe you should be the one to ring the bell,” she said sheepishly.    
  
“And run away?” Lena teased, coaxing a small titter from Kara that she covered up with a cough. It took her only a moment to double-check the apartment number before punching it into the call box. She heard an audible buzzing sound from somewhere inside and pushed open the front door.    
  
“What floor does grandma live on?” Fi asked, marching in behind Lena, taking her usual position behind her the way she always did when priming to meet someone new. 

_ Grandma,  _ Lena mused.  _ Bet you never thought anyone would ever call you that. But I never would have thought someone would ever call me mom…  _   
  
“Grandma lives right at the very top,” Lena said as all three of them stepped into the elevator. The doors slid shut and Lena scanned the array of buttons before pressing the one that would take them to the highest floor.    
  
It wasn’t just Fi who took refuge behind Lena when they came to a stop in front of the door to Lillian’s penthouse, Kara also took a small step back so that Lena was in the lead. Lena paused with her finger on the doorbell and shot Kara an amused smirk before pressing it and heard the faintest chime of bells from inside. She heard footsteps approach and the click of a lock before the door swung open to reveal her mother standing there wearing something that Lena had never seen her in before: an apron.    
  
“Hello, Lena,” Lillian said with a carefulness that Lena had never heard before. She opened the door wider and made brief eye contact with Kara who had clasped one of Fi’s hands gently in her own. “Kara.”   
  
“L—Miss Luthor,” Kara quickly amended and smiled warmly at her, looking just as nervous as Lena felt.   
  
“And you must be Fiona.”    
  
Fi nodded shyly, peering out at her from behind Lena. “You’re my grandma?” she asked looking up at Lena for confirmation.    
  
Seeing the careful skepticism on Fi’s face, Lena was both proud and more than a little amused, the corners of her mouth twitching as she nodded. “Yes, my treasure, this is your grandma.”  _ Please, please, for the love of God, don’t let this be a mistake.  _

“Come on in,” Lillian said and took a step back to let them inside. She cinched her apron tighter around her waist and when a buzzing sound came floating in from the kitchen she very quickly pointed them towards the living room. “I just need a minute to check on dinner. Make yourselves comfortable.”    
  
“You’re cooking?” Lena called after her mother’s retreating form, unable to stop herself. She and Kara exchanged identical looks of surprise. Lena couldn’t recall a single time that she had ever seen her mother in the kitchen back at the mansion, something that she was sure the staff was thankful for, which might have been why so many of them had taken their breaks there.    
“I am,” she called back, once again, her response devoid of the icy chill that Lena simply had expected to accompany every word out of her mouth. “I took a class,” she said, “A private class,” she added as if she too found the idea of her taking a cooking class with others just as mind-boggling as Lena did. 

Still processing the fact that her mother had seemingly learned to cook, Lena sat down stiffly on the end of the leather sofa sitting against the far wall. She managed a genuine smile when Fi clambered up beside her and it only widened when Kara sat down on Fi’s other side. She kissed the side of Fi’s head and gave her cape another little flutter with her hand. That seemed enough to blow the last stubborn dregs of shyness away because Fi didn’t bother to lean close to Lena’s ear to whisper the question she had.    
  
“Does grandma live here all by herself?”    
  
“Not completely,” Lillian answered before Lena had been able to cobble together a polite enough answer. She had returned from the kitchen with a streak of flour on her cheek that she wiped away with a kind of fussiness that Lena recognized from her childhood. It was the face her mother made when she felt as if she had been inconvenienced. “Loki’s stalking around here somewhere,” she said and put her hands on her knees as she bent forward to peer underneath the piano on the opposite wall.    
  
“Loki?” Lena asked.   
  
“I have a cat,” she said primly and pointed towards a chair situated close to the door overlooking the large balcony.    
  
“A cat?!” Kara and Fi said together, both of them bending down to get a better look underneath the chair that Lilian was pointing to. Fi hopped off the sofa and took a few steps towards the chair that Lillian had pointed to before trotting back to Lena. “Can I go say hello?” she asked sweetly.   
  
“I don’t know,” Lena answered honestly. “He might be napping,” she said.  _ And he might scratch,  _ Lena thought, not wanting to vocalize that concern for fear of scaring Fi. “Better ask Grandma,” Lena suggested trying not to dwell too much on the idea of her putting her trust in her mother, something that she had learned time and time again was a bad idea...   
  
“He’s  _ always  _ napping. You can definitely say hello,” she assured Fi and when Fi took off like a shot, she caught Lena’s eye. “He’s never once scratched me,” she said as if she could read Lena’s mind. “The worst thing that he’ll do is beg her for more attention.” She shook her head and looked to Lena as if she had a hard time fathoming such an existence. 

“Be gentle with him, Fi,” Lena called over to her, still wanting to run to her side, despite all of her mother’s assurances. 

“I’ll go say hello too,” Kara said standing up. “I  _ love  _ cats.” She reached over and gave Lena a reassuring squeeze on the arm that got her heart immediately racing. Kara flashed Lena a somewhat knowing smile, stood up, and walked over to where Fi was laying on her stomach to get a better look under the chair.    
  
“You named him, Loki?” Lena asked.   
  
“It seemed appropriate,” Lillian offered up and when she didn’t elaborate any further, Lena considered the matter closed until Lillian pointed to the arm of the couch which she realized was riddled with scratch marks. “Five scratchings posts in the house and he still loves to scratch up every bit of Italian leather in the apartment.”   
  
“Good taste,” Lena offered and was surprised when Lillian chuckled. Had she ever heard her laugh before? She had  _ definitely _ heard her cackle several times or at least do something very similar to it when she had been in the middle of gloating but she couldn’t recall a single time that she actually laughed.  _ It suits you, mother.  _   
  
“If only his palate was so discerning. He’ll eat anything I put down in front of him. But our dinner’s ready, just waiting on the potstickers. I—”   
  
“You actually  _ made  _ potstickers?”    
  
“You said that Kara loves them,” she said slowly. “Did you not?”   
  
“I did. I just didn’t expect you to make them.”   
  
“You didn’t have to go to all the trouble, Miss Luthor,” Kara said from the other side of the room. She had successfully coaxed the cat out from under the chair and was sitting cross-legged on the floor with him curled up in her lap while Fi gently stroked under his chin, looking completely in love. The cat was a sleek-looking tortoiseshell that had a brilliant patch of orange over its left eye and despite his nap time being interrupted, looked completely at peace lying there in Kara’s lap despite them just having met.    
  
“You can call me, Lillian, Miss Luthor seems a bit formal now,” she said with a very tiny shrug of her shoulders that made it clear that the decision was wholly Kara’s.   
  
“Alright then. “Lillian," she said carefully, testing the waters.   
  
“Should I call you Lillian too?” Fi asked shyly, her attention split between the cat who was purring contently with its tail sashaying left to right and Lillian.   
  
“I would prefer Grandma,” she said with a small smile. “But, whatever you prefer, Fiona.”

Fi hummed. “Grandma’s better,” she said after a few seconds of very careful deliberation.   
  
Lillian nodded. “I think so too.”   


* * *

  
  
Lillian had prepared a roast chicken and potatoes that she cooked to near perfection with a spinach salad that Lena was able to spoon onto her plate without a fuss. Maybe because Kara had made a big show about piling a large portion onto her plate just before she had passed the bowl to them. Lena wasn’t sure if the show was for Fi’s benefit or her mother’s but appreciated it all the same. There was also a platter of potstickers that Lillian carried out of the kitchen not long after everyone had sat down that she set down closest to Kara.   
  
“It’s my first time making them,” she said and surveyed the platter with a sour expression on her face, clearly not happy with the result. “Not that it’s an excuse but they could have turned out better.”   
  
“They look amazing,” Kara gushed, phone already in hand while she tried to find a good angle to snap a picture. “ _ This  _ was your first time?” She gestured to the platter and snapped a quick photo that she seemed happy with because she stowed her phone back in her pocket. “I really hope you didn’t go to all the trouble for me, though. It’s too much.”   
  
“It was no trouble.” Lillian sat back down and pulled her chair closer to the table. “Cooking has become something of a hobby of mine.”    
  
“I noticed,” Lena said and held out her plate to let Kara drop a few potstickers onto her plate. “Since when did you take up cooking?”    
  
“Oh… Four years now?” She furrowed her brow and Lena could better see the fine lines that bracketed the corners of her mother’s mouth that appeared to be one of the few signs that her mother did in fact age. “I don’t have a particular knack for it, but that might be why I’ve gravitated to it.”   
  
“You always did like a challenge,” Lena agreed. “Natural talent or not,” she said, this is all  _ very  _ good. It’s our first home-cooked meal since getting here.”  _ Maybe the last,  _ she reminded herself. Her reason for being back in National City would officially be concluded after tonight and under other circumstances, Lena would be more than ready to return. But there was Kara to think about, and what she had asked of her the night before… To stay...   
  
“Thank you, Lena…”   
  
“You’re welcome,” Lena replied, nonplussed, and turned her head towards Fi to partially obscure the shock that she knew was visible on her face. “How’s your dinner, my treasure?”   
  
“Really good,” she replied with a forkful of potato halfway to her mouth. Lena watched her left hand twitch towards her cape and Lena slid a napkin over towards her like a card dealer and winked. “Not a napkin,” she reminded her with a grin. “You can’t possibly save the world in a dirty cape.”   
  
Fi nodded solemnly and took the napkin, dabbing at her mouth.   
  
“She went as Supergirl for Halloween,” Lena said, turning back to her mother. “If the cape didn’t make it obvious enough. I have pictures if you want to see,” she offered.    
  
“I’d love to."   
  
Once again surprised, Lena reached into the pocket of her jeans and pulled out her phone. She leaned closer to her mother and quickly swiped through a series of photos that she had taken since then. There was one she had taken in front of L-Corp with Sam standing just off-center with her hand half-heartedly covering her face and a few others of her and Fi taken in their hotel room. She finally found the ones she had taken on Halloween night and blushed when she swiped to one she had taken of herself, Kara and Fi huddled together in front of one of the last houses they had visited before calling it a night.    
  
“It looks like the three of you had a good time,” Lillian said without a hint of mockery in her voice.    
  
“We did,” Kara answered, spearing another potsticker off the platter and dropping it onto her plate. “Best Halloween I’ve ever had.”   
  
“And I got  _ lots  _ of candy,” Fi added.    
  
“Yes, you could open up your own sweet shop,” Lena said, thinking of the candy mountain that Fi had spent so much time arranging just right on the coffee table in their hotel room and how with even the three of them nibbling on it together it was still very much a monolith of chocolate and nougat. 

“I did make dessert too,” Lillian said and speared a few pieces of spinach onto her fork. “So I hope that you haven’t had your fill of sweets just yet.”   
  
“Oh no,” Lena answered for Fi and reached over to give her arm a playful squeeze. “I don’t think that’s possible. For Fi or Kara,” she teased.   
  
“Hey!” Kara said, not able to mount a stronger defense with her mouth full of food.   
  
“Not possible,” Fi agreed, and maybe because she knew dessert was coming she took another bite of her salad and smiled sweetly at Lena who smiled right back.   
  


* * *

  
  
After the table had been cleared, Lillian brought out a chocolate cake from the kitchen on a glittering glass cake stand that she set in the middle of the table before she hurried back into the kitchen muttering about plates.    
  
“I can help you with that,” Lena offered. She stood up, chair scraping against the floor in her haste to follow after her. Stepping into the kitchen, Lena took a moment to marvel at the kitchen which was so clean that it was glittering. There was a bowl of fresh fruit on the kitchen island and a neat stack of dishes in the sink, evidence of how time-consuming preparing their meal had been. Lena found her gaze drawn to a number of cookbooks lined up neatly against the wall near the looming tower that was her mother's fridge, fit so snug against one another that it must have been a hassle pulling one out without yanking the whole damn row out with it.    
  
“You weren’t kidding about cooking being a hobby,” Lena said and accepted the handful of dainty pastry forks that her mother held out to her.   
  
“No,” she said, taking a handful of small plates down from a high shelf. "I thought it would be a waste of the kitchen if I didn't put it to use. She took a few steps back towards the dining room and came to a sudden stop. "Everything was really okay?"

"More than okay. Fi asked for a second helping of salad which isn't always the easiest thing. That's the equivalent of snagging a Michelin star or two. Maybe even harder.” 

Lillian chuckled. "I'll have to take your word for it.” She took another step towards the dining room and stopped again. “Lena?”   
  
“Yeah?” 

“Thank you for agreeing to dinner,” she said and glanced over her shoulder at Lena very briefly before she swept from the kitchen before Lena could reply. Following in her wake, Lena passed forks around the table while her mother cut generous wedges of cake for the four of them.    
  
She took the two plates that her mother passed to her and placed one down in front of Fi who was waiting just as patiently as a kid seven going on eight could be. “What do you say to your grandma, Fi?”    
  
“Thank you, Grandma!” Fi said, leaning so far over the table that she nearly put her elbow in the piece of cake in front of her. The thank you came easily and so full of genuine appreciation that Lena could feel the enormity of her love for Fi swell in her chest.    
  
“You’re very welcome, Fiona.” Lillian smiled hesitantly and almost seemed to shrink under the intensity of Fi’s smile, her gaze lowering to the piece of cake in front of her that was still untouched.   
  
“Do you make a lot of cakes?” Fi asked her while she carefully used her fork to saw off a bite-sized piece of cake and speared it on the end of her fork.    
  
“Not many,” Lillian said. “I’ve never cared for sweets if you can believe it.”

“Oh,” Fi said, the shock on her face making it clear that she almost  _ couldn’t  _ believe it. “But you still made one today.”   
  
“Today is a very special occasion,” Lillian said. “It’s not every day that you get to meet your granddaughter.” She picked up her fork and cut a small wedge off the already thin slice she had set down in front of herself and smiled. “Tell me if it has too much chocolate.”   
  
“Oh, I wouldn’t worry about that,” Lena said, wholly unconcerned.   
  
Fi nodded in agreement and took her first bite. She chewed and immediately began to tap Lena persistently on the arm. “It’s really good,” she said in one of her patented loud whispers.   
  
“I had a feeling it was,” Lena said and pointed to Kara’s plate which was already empty save for a few crumbs.    
  
“I like cake,” Kara said without an ounce of shame. “It was amazing, Lillian.  _ Everything  _ was. I’ve been baking for years and if I ever made something as good as your cake I might need to consider opening up a bakery.”    
  
“You’d be depriving the world of an amazing reporter,” Lena scolded playfully. She might have asked Kara just what she might call this fictitious bakery if Fi didn’t tug once again on her arm to get her attention.   
  
“Can I go pet, Loki?” Fi asked sweetly, showing off a plate that was even cleaner than Kara’s.    
  
Lena glanced over at her mother before she nodded. “Yes, you can, but let’s go wash your hands first before you do. I don’t think he would like it if you got chocolate all over him," she said and pointed out a smudge of frosting on Fi's pinky finger.   
  
“The bathroom is just down the hall, first door on the left,” Lillian said, pointing to a hallway right behind her.   
  
“Did you have a cat growing up?” Fi asked hopping down off her chair with her hands held out carefully in front of her.   
  
“No,” Lena answered, smiling to herself. “I had horses.”   
  
“Horses?”   
  
Lena nodded.  
  
“Can  _ we  _ get a horse?”    
  
_ Walked right into that one, didn’t I?  _ “We’ll be right back, just as soon as I get done negotiating with Fi.”   
  
“Take your time,” Kara said, looking completely unworried. She had cut another sliver of cake for herself and had a forkful of cake almost to her mouth when Lillian cleared her throat.    
  
“Kara?”   
  
“Yes?!”   
  
“May I ask what exactly you are to my daughter?”   
  


* * *

_ Haven’t you already asked me this question? _   
  
Kara felt her cheeks start to burn and felt incredibly thankful that she hadn't actually taken a bite before Lillian had asked her question because she probably would have sent a spray of crumbs out over the length of the table. “I—”   
  
“I already know,” Lillian said quickly, pushing her half-eaten piece of cake away and folding her hands on the table in front of her. “I just wanted to be sure that  _ you  _ knew, Kara.”   
  
“We’re friends again,” Kara said and when Lillian’s gaze turned a degree or two colder, she bristled uncomfortably in her seat. “I want to be whatever Lena needs me to be,” Kara said after a long stretch of silence. “As a friend or something more… I just want her to be a part of my life again.”   
  
Lillian let out a sigh and tapped her fork impatiently against the side of her plate. “That’s very…  _ noble,”  _ she said slowly, each word sounding as if each word caused her physical pain. “But after all the time you two spent apart…”   
  
“I asked her to stay,” Kara said in a very small voice. “I  _ want  _ them to stay. With me,” she added needlessly, suddenly not the least bit hungry. She was still waiting to hear Lena’s answer and while she had tried not to dwell on it, she hadn’t been all that successful. She told herself that either way, they had found their way back to one another and that would be enough for her and at first she had truly believed that but with each passing day it was becoming more difficult to believe that.    
  
“Well,” Lillian said, looking somewhat mollified. “That’s _something_ , I suppose.” She pinched the bridge of her nose between her thumb and index finger and let out a long, low sigh before she looked up to meet Kara’s gaze. “While I have you alone,” she said. “I owe you an apology as well. Multiple ones, I’m sure…”   
  
“Lillian,” Kara started and fell silent when Lillian held up a hand.    
  
“I’m embarrassed about the person I was before, the things that I did…” She let out a very long sigh and shook her head. “I hurt you a great deal, tried to…” She pursed her lips and fell silent. “I can’t even say it out loud,” she muttered. “I know it doesn’t make up for anything that I did and you don’t need to accept my apology but I want you to know just how truly sorry I am for hurting you.”   
  
“Of course I’ll accept your apology.” Kara looked at her completely nonplussed. “After a meal like that, I don’t know how I could not,” she joked, smiling brightly.    
  
Lillian chuckled. “Now you know why I took all those cooking classes.” She cleared her throat and gestured to Lena’s recently vacated chair. “I doubt that Lena will ever want to meet me again,” she said. “If you and Lena ever did finally stop beating around the bush… You wouldn’t need to worry about seeing me again if you were worried about another evening like this...”   
  
Kara shook her head, listening to the sound of the running faucet in the bathroom, and could hear Fi making careful inquiries about the possibility of them getting a pet and smiled.  _ I don’t know how you don’t spoil her rotten, Lena…  _ Smiling, she turned her attention back to Lillian. “I can’t speak for Lena… But I would be crazy to turn down another dinner invitation if it ever came my way…”   
  
“Anyone that wants to spend time with me,” Lillian muttered and shook her head disapprovingly in a way that Kara found strangely familiar. “Whatever happens between the two of you in the future, Kara… Please don’t hurt my daughter.” Lillian suddenly looked fearful and her eyes sparkled. She glanced away for only a moment before looking back at Kara, the sparkle completely gone as if it had never been there in the first place.   
  
“Never,” Kara said. She leaned forward in her chair and felt her stomach clench uncomfortably at the sudden resurgence of old memories, old pain. “I would never hurt Lena or Fi,” Kara said solemnly.  _ Never again. “ _ Never.”   
  
Lillian sniffed and sat up even more straight-backed in her chair. She pushed her chair back and stood up. “You said that you had a cat growing up?”   
  
“Yes,” Kara said and found herself smiling at the memory. “Streaky. He was my first friend here on Earth if you don’t count Alex and she didn’t really like me all that much when I first arrived so…”   
  
“Interesting name,” Lillian said, striding past Kara towards the living room. “I’m sure that Loki would love all the extra attention he can get unless you have chocolate on your hands too....”

* * *

  
  
Lena had imagined the evening to be spent watching the clock until they had spent the appropriate amount of time there before beating a hasty retreat. What she hadn’t imagined was spending the evening swapping stories with Kara about their lives while Fi sat stock-still so as not to disturb Loki who had taken up residence on her lap, curled up there, purring and glancing up at Fi now and again with one eye opened blearily until she continued petting him.    
  
Lillian didn’t do much talking, seemingly happy to just listen, asking the occasional question without ever drawing too much attention to herself as if she were afraid that she was somewhere that she didn’t truly belong and didn’t want to draw attention to that fact.    
  
Only when Lena caught Fi dozing did she finally catch her mother’s eye who seemed to understand at once.    
  
“It’s fine, Lena,” she said before Lena had a chance to speak. “You’ve stayed long enough.”   
  
Lena could only nod, not quite sure how to answer. She stood up and was surprised at just how tired  _ she  _ felt until she realized that it was nearly midnight.  _ I should have had you in bed hours ago, my treasure.  _ She leaned down to scoop Fi up and did so only after giving Loki a gentle nudge and a scratch behind his ears to get to slink off of Fi’s lap and over to the spot on the couch that Lena had just stood up from.    
  
Lifting her as gently as she could, she felt Fi stir against her shoulder as she tried to get her bearings.   
  
“Mom?” Fi mumbled against her shoulder.    
  
“It's past your bedtime, love. It’s time we head home.” She heard Fi mumble something incomprehensible against her shoulder and snuggle closer while she walked with Kara right behind her.    
  
When they reached the door, Lena felt Fi once again stir against her shoulder and she leaned up to whisper in her ear.    
  
“I want to say goodbye to Grandma,” she said, her voice still thick with sleep.    
  
“Go right ahead, my treasure.” Lena expected her to wave but instead, Fi reached out and urged Lillian closer which she obliged, looking politely confused.    
  
“Thank you for the cake, Grandma, and for meeting me,” Fi said before she leaned forward and kissed Lillian on the cheek before snuggling back against Lena’s shoulder.    
  
“Thank you, Fiona,” Lillian said in a very quiet voice, touching the place on her cheek where Fi had kissed her, clearly touched. “Fi…”   
  
“Lena…” Kara gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze. “I can take her and wave us down a cab if you like…” she offered. 

_ If you want some more time to say goodbye,  _ Lena thought, knowing that was what Kara wanted to offer her. “She’s heavy,” Lena warned her with a smile before she handed Fi off just as gently as she could manage.    
  
“Supergirl, remember?” Kara flashed Lena a radiant smile and took Fi from her. “Thank you for the lovely evening, Lillian.”   
  
“You’re very welcome, Kara. Thank you for coming.”

Kara beamed and very gently eased open the apartment door, stepped out, and shut it behind her soundlessly leaving Lena and her mother alone.    
  
The silence that immediately began to grow between the two had the potential to turn awkward and it probably would have if Lillian didn’t almost immediately bolt from the room. “I bought a Christmas present for Fiona,” she called from the other room. “For you as well. I know it’s a little early but I thought I should give it to her now…” She returned from the other room with two gifts wrapped in delicate gold wrapping paper and held them out to Lena.    
  
“You didn’t have to do that…”   
  
“You didn’t have to come to dinner,” Lillian countered.    
  
“I suppose I didn’t,” Lena agreed, still not taking the gifts from her. “Christmas is still months away.”    
  
“Lena…” she said, taking on a tone that Lena found far more familiar. “If you don’t want to give her the gift, you don’t need to take it.”   
  
“It’s not that,” Lena said and found herself considering something that would have seemed crazy just a day or so ago… Or maybe it still was. She watched Loki pad over to Lillian and wind between her legs, purring.   
  
“I told you that he can never get enough attention.” Lillian sighed but reached down to scratch him behind his ears anyway.   
  
“I know that Fi would love to see him again and if she knows that there’s a Christmas present in the house, the suspense is going to drive her up the wall… So maybe you should just hold onto it… Give it to her closer to Christmas. Maybe you could visit us if you like…”   
  
“Of course, I would.” Her mother blinked and cleared her throat. “If that’s alright with you.”   
  
“I think it is,” Lena said carefully, still not quite able to put her guard down completely.    
  
“Anytime, Lena. Whenever you’re ready.”   
  
“I shouldn’t keep Kara waiting too long, it’s freezing out and I don’t want Fi to catch a cold.” She reached for the door and had her hand on the knob when Lillian spoke again.

“Yes, I think you kept that poor girl waiting long enough, don’t you?” She caught Lena’s eye when she poked her head back inside and waved her off the same way that Lena sometimes did when she gave Fi permission to go play.

* * *

  
“Fi’s going to demand that I read her  _ two  _ stories tomorrow night to make up for missing tonight,” Lena said as she sat down next to Kara on the couch in her pajamas, hair pulled back into a ponytail.   
  
“That sounds fair,” Kara said agreeably. She grinned at Lena and pulled her closer to her, sending Lena’s heart into overdrive for a few seconds .  
  
“Taking her side?” Lena joked, putting one of her legs up on the coffee table.   
  
“I hate to pick sides,” Kara whispered. “But…” She shook her head sadly. “I might have another weakness other than kryptonite. Alex might want to run some tests to be sure…”   
  
“I warned you,” Lena said and felt her breath catch in her chest when Kara leaned her head against her shoulder.    
  
“You read her one and I read her one? How does that sound?” Kara asked, looking up at Lena without lifting her head.   
  
_ It sounds wonderful.  _   
  
“Are you sure that’s how you want to spend your evening?” Lena asked, almost afraid to hear her answer.   
  
“Lena,” Kara said, almost sounding as if she were scolding her. “There is no other place that I would rather be.  _ Nowhere. _ ”  
  
Taking a breath, Lena waited for her heart to stop beating quite so fast before she spoke again, knowing that Kara could hear it clearly. “What you asked me to think about last night, Kara…” She felt Kara tense beside her, bracing herself. “I  _ want  _ to stay with you Kara, I didn’t even need to think it over for a second to know that, I just…”   
  
“Just what?”   
  
“It’s been so long,” Lena said thickly. She tried to blink back the tears that had begun forming and knew at once she was fighting a losing battle. "And I have Fi now."  
  
“But you’re here,” Kara said. She sat up and took Lena by the shoulders gently, “I’m  _ here _ . That’s all that matters And I love Fi. Why would that matter?"   
  
“I’m older,” Lena said and pointed to Kara. “And you look exactly the same as I remember you, Kara. It doesn't look like you've aged a day..."   
  
“I did change my hair,” she said and pointed to her forehead. “No bangs, if you didn’t notice.”   
  
“You know what I mean,” Lena said, sniffling.    
  
“I don’t, Lena,” Kara said, her eyes wide. “You lost me.”   
  
“Do you still…” She tried to steady herself and found herself unable to hold back the floodgates any longer, tears beginning to fall that Kara brushed away without question. “Would you still want me?”   
  
So worried about the truth that she might see on Kara’s face, Lena tried to turn away and felt Kara press her hand against her cheek, caressing it softly, urging her to meet her gaze. Fighting against the inevitable for a moment longer, she looked up and saw Kara staring back at her, a scant few inches separating them.    
  
“Lena,” Kara said, so close to her now that Lena could feel the softness of her breath against her lips when she spoke that made it hard for Lena to remember to breathe. “I never stopped.”   
  
Lena bit back a tiny sob and groped for Kara's hand, finding it and letting Kara guide it to the small of her back.    
  
"Can I kiss you?" Kara whispered.  
  
Lena answered Kara's question with the tiniest of nods and felt Kara's lips press against hers, tentative at first before she heard Kara let out a breathy sigh that Lena thought she might hear in her dreams. Leaning into the kiss, her fingertips pressing firmly against the small of Kara's back, urging her closer, to do away with any distance between the two of them, wanting her impossibly close. She felt Kara's hand travel up along her arm, electricity racing up her arm like a lit fuse until Kara's hand was tangled in her ebony locks and pulled Lena into a kiss that was all fireworks and warmth that she hoped would never end.  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading and being so patient if you were waiting for an update! Getting closer to the finish line and it's going to be real fluffy. 
> 
> Come ask me things here [Tumblr](https://inkedroplets.tumblr.com/)


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